SUFFERING IS A CHOICE

These are some of my favorite passages in “Rise Up and Awaken to the Joy of Being Human.” by Keira Poulsen.

 

— For as long as I can remember, I have always felt like I do not belong. Religion, friend groups, school... you name it; I always felt like an outsider. Upon reflection, I think this Earth has made me feel that I don't belong.

Human life has had its challenges for me. There was childhood abuse. I was born with really big ears that stuck out. I was super creative and highly sensitive. I could feel other people's emotions and that made me want to be alone. I had many spiritual gifts that I was unaware of, which made human life uncomfortable.

But the paradox is that despite all this, I have loved life on this planet. I have always found joy in the smallest moments in life. The leaves fluttering in the wind can bubble up joy from my heart. The views of the sunrise and the sunset can fill my soul with excitement. A cow grazing in a pasture can rouse feelings of peace and tender gratitude.

The truth is that human life is a paradox. It is truly one of the most extraordinary experiences to have. We have been blessed with senses that activate pleasure and joy in our beings. As humans, we have the ability to connect to others and to feel love. joy is the basis of human existence. I believe that joy is our inherent birthright.

And... human existence is smothered in pain. There is abuse, addiction, isolation, and suffering. Disconnection is rampant, as suffering pulls you inside yourself and disconnects you from those around you. Addiction is the numbing agent used for the pain. Abuse is tied into the generational patterns that have been tethered to our cells. Isolation is the coping mechanism to shut out the suffering of others and is the hope of protection.

These are all real. And...they are here, even among the joy. The pain and the joy; they can't be separated. They beautifully balance out each other. The pain deepens your feelings of joy.

Without the pain, joy would cease to be novel. As a constant feeling, it would become monotonous. Uneventful and boring.

Joy is the relief from pain. It is the light that pours through our beings and activates hope, happiness, and love.

There is a need for both. There would be no light if there was no darkness. The contrast is what makes the other real. It is from this context that I am writing this book for you. I hold pain and joy in reverence. They are sacred. They make us experience life in its grandest and most abundant ways. It is suffering that clouds our minds and, perhaps, stunts our growth. Suffering is not needed. And yet... for most people, it is where they spend their days. Suffering is a choice. Pain is necessary for growth, contrast, and healing. Suffering will only mask your gifts and delete your joy.

Suffering DELETES joy.

But, very few of us have been taught that you choose to suffer. Instead, it is a way of being, having been passed down through the generations.

Suffering is accepted in society as a way of life.

It is taught that it is fine to suffer, to be unhappy, to be cynical, afraid, guarded, and full of complaints.

How many times do you talk to someone on the phone with all these flavors of suffering dominant in the conversation?

Why is it more common to hear complaints and unhappiness rather than the joyful and magical things that are occurring in their life?

Sadly, suffering is what is accepted.

The joy and magic are rejected.

If you were to share the magic of the sunrise and the joy you felt as you planted seeds on a particular day, with everyone you talked to that day... you, probably, won't be received well. Would you feel accepted, if you were to tell your friend about the joy you felt when your favorite song came up on the radio, or that you felt deep joy as you rocked your baby to sleep that morning? These are just not acceptable conversations in our world.

But, if you were to complain about your marriage, your kids, or your job... you would be received with open arms and yes, the other party would present a bunch of their own complaints.

Misery attracts company.

And at some level, this has become our society's way of acceptable conversations.

During this year of 2020, this has become more apparent than ever. Sharing positive and happy things have felt out of place, and they have not been easily received by others.

Sharing your suffering, though, has been wildly accepted, and you are part of the majority. If you jump in and share your suffering, you feel as though you belong! You are invited to join this popular group of suffering and unhappiness.

Why do we join in? Suffering isn't desired. But belonging is. We all want to feel as though we belong. It is an innate desire. I have heard it described as our tribal feelings. Look at our ancestors' lives: they had to belong, or they would be kicked out from their tribe. I agree with this theory. And I also believe it is rooted in our desire for connection.

Connection is our lifeblood. It is what we ache for. Connection is what makes us human! And the idea of being disconnected and not belonging is scarier than anything else.

And so, we suffer to belong. But what if I told you that suffering was only an illusion? An illusion that seems so realistic, most people believe it to be as true as the arm on their body.

It is my belief that each one of us were prepared to belong here. We were prepared with unique gifts, talents, and high sensitivities, which were designed to help humanity at the time we came to live.

And the illusion of suffering is the foremost tool to hijack you on your path. It can literally stop you in your tracks and keep you stunted.

Suffering is what will cover your spiritual eyes, dumb down your gifts, and plague your life with unhappiness and dead ends.

Suffering wipes out joy. The good news is... suffering is purely a choice. You have the right to choose if you want to jump into this illusion of suffering, or if you want to remove it from your body and instead choose joy. This workbook is designed to help you remember joy. And that is simply it. We came here knowing joy. We came to this Earth embodied with joy. And somewhere along the journey, we forgot it. We forgot how easy joy is. All we need to do is simply remember what we have always known. We know joy. It is at the origin of our existence. Joy is our divine birthright.

I have learned of some simple tools, which will begin to heighten your awareness of joy. I believe if you commit to working through this workbook, you will awaken a remembrance inside of you, which activates JOY. I believe that when you start experiencing more joy, your deep longing to belong will start fading away because the remembrance of your gifts and purpose will start to rise.

As your purpose begins to sprout forward, nourished by your joy; you will remember that you do indeed belong.

You belong here because you were prepared to be here. You have gifts, which this world needs. And as you begin to share your gifts, your whole being will radiate with fulfillment and joy.

You, my friend, belong here.

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