Life Lessons

RUNNING WITH GRACE: LOVING THE ENTIRE BUMPY JOURNEY

A Quest for Well-Being Interview with

LORI VAN DUSEN  

1— What inspired you to become who you are and to do what you do today?

My grandfather loved the stock market. When I was seven years old, he started showing me annual reports of companies in which he was interested in investing. It’s a funny story to recall now, so many years later, but it shows how being mentored and exposed to things early is crucial to childhood development.

I began my career in the World Trade Center after graduating from Harvard University. I was hired by (Shearson) Lehman brothers. They had to hire anyone who passed the interviews, the quantitative testing, and regulatory licensing. There was a training program that started with about 300 people in it, and by the end of three years, there were maybe 30 people remaining.

This was in 1987, and I was the only woman in the program. No one expected me to make it through, no one mentored me. I firmly believe that, because of my background and the strength of my family roots, along with prior mentoring and formal training and discipline which came from being a musician, I became one of the top producers and advisors in the firm nationwide. At that time, it was Smith Barney, and is now Morgan Stanley.

In 2008, when the financial crisis was in full swing, and mistrust and misjudgment percolated in a fiery and toxic stew, I declared my independence and joined Convergent Wealth Advisors in my hometown of Rochester, NY. Most of my clients followed. Three years later, I founded LVW Advisors. Today, LVW manages approximately $2 billion for wealthy families and nonprofit institutions.

2— What do you do specifically?

I am the Founder and CEO of LVW Advisors, a registered investment advisory firm that serves both wealthy families and individuals, as well as nonprofit institutions throughout the United States. An advocate of client-focused strategies for more than 25 years, I strive to become the voice of reason for providing unbiased integrated solutions in a fragmented financial services industry. I’m passionate about numerous philanthropic causes, and hold the honor of serving on several boards focused on urban education, health and wellness, and the fine arts.

3— What was the inspiration, intention, and purpose of writing your book and where can we find it?

My book, Running with Grace: A Wall Street Insider’s Path to True Leadership, a Purposeful Life, and Joy in the Face of Adversity Began as a journaling exercise recommended by a therapist as a way to move forward, because I was in a place where I felt I had only two choices continue to suffer because of my grief or begin living again. I needed to find a way to integrate my loss and begin the process of healing.  At the time, I had no plans to publish this work –it was too deeply personal. 

As I journaled, I could tell that I had begun healing, and about three months after I lost my mother, I realized that I wasn’t meant to go through all these experiences and profound loss without a way to pay it forward.  Although, it wasn’t until I was able to write about my husband in a way that honored him that was also truthful and with integrity, that I really considered publishing the book to a wider audience. 

Our culture and social media can really distort perceptions.  From the outside, I had an amazing life–an incredible career and the perfect marriage.  I realized I wanted to share my story–as a way to show others that they were not alone in facing trials and hardship.  And no matter what it looks like from the outside, the reality could be very different.

At this point, I was ready to share the manuscript with a couple of readers.  In addition to my sons, I chose two people, from widely different backgrounds, who were avid readers and people I trusted.  My sons and my readers were in emphatic agreement.  I needed to share my story to the wider world. 

I began working with an editor to shape my journaling into a book–and with each story I shared, the lessons of resilience and grace kept coming through. 



4— Do you consider what you do a calling, a purpose, a mission? 

All of the above really.  I have always felt a purpose-driven calling to do the work I do. I wanted to disrupt the industry. I wasn’t afraid to do it differently and not afraid to take on the establishment in a very tough business. I have been fighting the big Wall Street establishment my entire career. I can do this and know this is what people need.  

Throughout my career,  I have always felt a greater sense of purpose around what the clients and industry needed versus what I personally needed.  Sometimes that was really challenging for me, and even though I knew it was the right decision but wasn’t the trodden path–it was a lonely and difficult road to get to where I am today.  I have struggled and made mistakes, but I know now that I would not be the person I am today without those failures and losses. 

My work has never been separated from my personal life – they are both inexorably intertwined.

5— Who would benefit most from your work and your message?  

Originally it was intended for a young woman or women in transition, yet what I’ve come to learn is that it’s really for anyone who has experienced loss, feels stuck, or is experiencing personal challenges.  If anyone has the courage or strength to really help anyone who is trying to find the courage to go to the next step to live a fulfilling life.  The high rates of depression and suicide all lead to the same road: a lack of purpose and not feeling like you matter. Based on my experience, I believe that I understand despair and what it means to feel lost.

6— What is it like working with you from a client’s perspective? 

Our clients would say they genuinely feel secure and safe in our hands.  Often we are their first call when it pertains to matters of finance or wealth management. And we know how to deliver the right answers and solutions to bring a project together in a cohesive and organized way.

Throughout my career,  I have always felt a greater sense of purpose around what the clients and industry needed versus what I personally needed.  I recognize that when discussing the most important traits in leaders, most people rate skill and competence above all else.  Yet I have always placed a higher value on integrity.  Through the adversity and loss I’ve experienced,  I have developed a much deeper empathy for people and resilience in both my professional and personal life. I’ve learned wisdom and I’ve been able to help others navigate complex situations in alignment with their values and principles. 



7—What is healing to you? 

To me, healing is finding the courage to lean into the setbacks, failures, and losses and fold them into life in order to move forward in a positive way.  To not only function at a higher level but to feel lifted to a higher frequency. I find healing through the help of meditation, praying, self-care, and realizing that there is a higher order to the universe. And of course, running!  It does not happen immediately, but the fog does eventually lift, especially if you are able to step outside of your mind and step into a more meditative space.  It is there where I often regain my self-confidence and inner peace.  

Everyone has to find their own path regarding how to “get there” but you don’t have to do it yourself.  

8— What are some of the misconceptions most people have about healing? 

As a society, we don’t understand healing that well.

I feel that many people bury their pain with activity and motion. But it’s not that simple. You cannot heal if you charge forward in life and pretend that everything is ok after experiencing emotional pain or a significant loss. Healing arrives through facing the root of what ails you head-on–and it’s very painful. People need to find the right team of support through friendships, professional help, or a spiritual guide.   

Healing is not something that you just do. It doesn’t neatly conform to our society’s view of how something is supposed to be (especially in men). If you don’t heal, it often expresses itself as anger.  I am not a therapist but based on my personal experience, it was clear that my husband had a deeply repressed sadness, yet never made the time to heal because his sadness was too painful. Our society does not do enough to support the need to heal after a traumatic experience or a loss.  At my company, it was imperative to me to change our policies to support anyone who has experienced any traumatic pain or personal loss.  

9—What do you feel is the purpose of the human experience? 

I feel that the purpose of the human experience is to connect and make a difference.  I think we’re all here for a reason which we can better recognize through spiritual growth.  To me, finding a sense of fulfillment, or purpose in this world is largely supported through developing meaningful deep relationships with others and giving back to society. We are here to grow and learn. Enlightenment, knowledge, and contributing and connecting with other humans help us to remain centered. 

10— What is your vision for humanity? 

I wish more people would question and engage in the meaning of life in order to find meaning and ultimately, purpose. The reasons why we are here has absolutely nothing to do with power and money which only alienate many from the true meaning of this human experience!  If more people exercised this “golden rule”, and treated others with kindness and respect, then this world would be a better place. 

11— What does emotional freedom look like? And how can your work help? 

Emotional freedom to me can be measured by peace, balance, and gratitude.

In my book Running with Grace, each chapter is organized around a positive message of strength. One title reads “Curveballs are great teachers,”; and another is “Love the entire bumpy journey.” Each of us will experience some form of failure and loss but it’s how we find the courage to not only face but learn from this adversity that matters most. 

Every morning I start with gratitude which sounds a bit trite, but I do not open an email, answer a call start a business project or look at the markets before I practice gratitude. I start by journaling what I am grateful for and what impact I will have in the current day. This is especially important because many days involve difficult meetings, planned or unplanned. I ask for guidance, strength, and grace to navigate whatever the day will bring.

MEET LORI VAN DUSEN 

Lori Van Dusen, CIMA, is the Founder and CEO of LVW Advisors, a registered investment advisory firm that serves both wealthy families and individuals, as well as nonprofit institutions throughout the United States. An advocate of client-focused strategies for more than 25 years, she has become the voice of reason for providing unbiased integrated solutions in a fragmented financial services industry. Lori is passionate about numerous philanthropic causes, serving on several boards focused on urban education, health and wellness, and the fine arts.

https://lvwadvisors.com/