IT'S NOT ABOUT REACHING GOALS — IT'S ABOUT REALIZING YOURSELF ALONG THE WAY

Here is an inspiring and insightful passage in “Be You: The Journey of Self-Realization” by Chris Cirak

 

— In the outer world, there are places you're familiar with, places you're not familiar with, and places you don't even know exist. The more familiar you are with a specific place, the more it feels like home.

Your inner world is no different. It consists of parts you're more familiar with, parts you're less familiar with, and parts you don't even know exist. The journey of self-realization is to feel at home in all your parts.

You can't be yourself if you don't know yourself.

It’s both ironic and beautiful that not knowing yourself is what propels you forward. Ironic because your mind is all about knowing. Beautiful because you get to experience the freshness of each new moment. Every part of you that you haven't yet realized contains both the anguish of not being you and the longing to be more of you.

Self-realization is the process of realizing who you are. You are never not experiencing this process. Every moment of every day, life is pushing you to know yourself better. More specifically, you are the one doing the pushing. Life is just a mirror. Stuck feelings are the fuel of your evolution.

If it feels like you’re taking detours instead of the direct route to your happiness, that’s your headspace talking. That’s when you criticize yourself for making mistakes, thinking you should know better. You forget that you’re a more realized person now, precisely because of how you've responded to things in the past. Ultimately, there’s no reason to fault yourself for anything, ever. In fact, it's the experience of not being you that has prompted you to become more of you. You haven't failed. You haven't taken a wrong turn. You’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to be doing.

You're always you, doing the best you can. There is no other way.

Resist the urge to plan out your life for fear you might go down the wrong road. Right and wrong only exist when you’re in your headspace, focused on outcomes. But in the great unfolding of your life, veering off your path is what accelerates you forward. Each time you veer, you grow in clarity, resilience, and determination. You become more of you. Your journey is meant to take you through a field of experiences. Detours and excursions aren't just part of your journey, they are your journey.

Everything you experience teaches you something new about yourself and puts you in touch with your feelings. How you respond to them directly impacts how much you participate in - and contribute to - the flow of life. When you keep your feelings stuck, you generate friction within yourself and with the environment. But by releasing them, you contribute free-flowing energy to the world.

As you become more realized, so does the world.

Less realized energy, longing to become more realized energy, is the engine behind life's continuous expansion. Everything you do is motivated by this pull. You buy things to experience abundance. You fall in love to experience unity. You set goals to experience fulfillment. You're always replacing what you think an experience is like with the actual experience of it.

That's why you're supposed to buy shiny things and be enamored by them. You're supposed to fall in love and promise each other foreverness. You're supposed to climb to the highest peaks and fall to the lowest lows. You're supposed to experience all those things because it's not about the things. It's not about reaching goals or achieving outcomes. It's about realizing yourself along the way…

P.S.: You will love Chris’ book and his work! He is one of the most genuine and open-hearted human beings I have ever met!

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YOU ARE MEANT TO HEAL AND BE YOU!

These are some of my favorite passages in “Be You: The Journey of Self-Realization” by Chris Cirak

 

— You know you’re attached when your environment dictates how you feel. When things are working in your favor, you’re happy. When they’re not, you’re sad. When others validate you, you gain confidence. When they criticize you, you become insecure. When you’re shown affection, you feel loved. When it is withheld, you feel abandoned. As long as you’re attached to the world around you to nurture you in whatever ways you haven't nurtured yourself, your life is an endless roller coaster of ups and downs.

You can become attached to anything: people, places, pets, your job, your looks, a memory, things you own - and of course, your life. But the biggest attachment of all is to outcomes. Everything you do from your headspace is with a specific outcome in mind. In fact, you start with the outcome you desire and then work your way backward, figuring out what you need to do to get there. This is how you wind up living for the future, disconnected from the now. You no longer do things for the joy of doing them. You do them because of what you expect in return.

You might even be inclined to accept greater hardship now, so later can be better. You work overtime so you can retire early. You have children so they can take care of you when you’re old. You put off pursuing your dreams because you would rather play it safe, afraid of what tomorrow might bring. Your whole life becomes about living for outcomes, and you completely forget that at the root of them are stuck feelings you can learn to release right now.

Every outcome you're attached to reflects stuck feelings inside.

— There’s no question that some experiences are very difficult and can affect you deeply. Fears and trauma from the past can torment you and turn your life on its head. Often, all you want is to manage your condition so you can become operational again. Rarely, if at all, do you expect to be as flawless as before.

But as you learn to release stuck feelings, you realize there are no unhealable wounds, there are no permanent scars, there is no everlasting damage. There are only layers of stuck feelings that you can learn to release. The more you release, the more you experience what is underneath: your unhurt, unblemished, unimpaired, fully realized self.

Healing is the process of releasing stuck feelings.

Whenever you experience difficult feelings, it is imperative to release them before trying to understand the root cause. Mental analysis is of secondary importance. Once you’re out of reactivity and back to flowing, you’re able to see the situation as it is, take clear action, and make positive and lasting changes in your life so unhealthy situations don't occur again. But you always need to come out of reactivity first, so you can hear your inner voice.

The more you heal yourself, the more your healing capacity grows beyond yourself. It profoundly impacts everything you do and everyone around you. Your mere presence is soothing and helps others to release their stuck feelings. You find yourself taking on and releasing the pain of your lineage, of your gender, of your generation, of an entire era. That’s how powerful you are.

In the process of healing yourself, you become a healing force for the world.

Once you release stuck feelings, they are no longer part of your reality. A completely new life experience opens up. Indifference turns into inspiration. Scarcity turns into abundance. Limitations turn into beauty. Fears give way to the endless possibilities and uninhibited creativity of life. You realize you are part of it all. Healing allows life to flow because being in the flow is your natural state.

Everything comes back to being you. Instead of living for outcomes, live for the simplicity of the incoming moment. Instead of seeking love outside of yourself, find it within yourself. Instead of trying to make life happen, let it happen. Instead of figuring it all out in advance, figure yourself out as you go.

Life is an unrelenting force that never gives up on you. Everything is designed to help you realize how perfect you are. You cannot avoid it. You are meant to heal.


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