Laura Gabayan

COMMON WISDOM: 8 SCIENTIFIC ELEMENTS OF A MEANINGFUL LIFE

A Quest for Well-Being Interview with

 DR. LAURA GABAYAN

1.     Why did you decide to study wisdom?  How did the idea for this research come about?

I am a physician-scientist (same as a physician-researcher). There are physicians that do not do research and mainly see patients, and then there are physicians who see patients and also do research. In medical school, we learned about diseases, diagnoses, and treatments. No one ever thought outside “outside the box.” For example, we did not learn about Chinese medicine or Indian ways of healing even though they are both the oldest living civilizations. Our instructors, who were scientists, were firmly entrenched solely in Western medicine. I then started searching for those who do think outside the box and who are original in how they think. There was only one group of individuals who had that different way of thinking: it was the wise.  

I then looked into wisdom and all I found were anecdotal thoughts and religious texts.  As a scientist, I needed more objectivity and started looking at published scientific manuscripts. The journals of Sociology, Psychology, and Geriatrics published a small amount of research on wisdom. These studies found that wisdom can only be identified by another human; not a test or a scale. The research also found that wisdom had an inverse U relationship with age and that the wisest people were in their 50s, 60s, and 70s. The very old started to lose wisdom as they became less flexible in their thinking and behavior. The research also found that wisdom was not related to gender, race, or political affiliation. Despite these findings, no one had taken the time to interview candidates.

Given that I believe you should do things yourself, I decided to do my own study on wisdom. I did not know anything about wisdom, but I knew how to create a research project. I hired a research assistant and a marketing specialist and from Oct 2022 to April 2023, I interviewed 60 wise individuals. The way I found these individuals was through telling anyone we knew if they were aware of someone wise and through postings on social media. We also asked interviewees to “nominate” other individuals that they knew were wise.

I then knew that the information obtained through the interviews had to be converted to data. As a scientist who had conducted a qualitative research study in the past, I knew that qualitative methods are ways to convert stories into data. Research is either qualitative or quantitative. Most of the research that we are familiar with deals with numbers and is quantitative. Then the team and I reviewed the internet recordings of the interviews and arrived at the 8 elements.  

2.     Your research led you to the discovery of eight primary elements of wisdom.  Which of the elements surprised you the most?  Why?

Kindness surprised me the most. I am Middle Eastern and being kind was always not viewed highly where I came from. It was viewed as being a pushover and not being very clever. It was also not something that families or society promoted.

Kindness was important to the interviewees in many ways. First, often the reason they were recommended for the study was because they engaged in kind acts towards others. Whether it was volunteering or helping mentor students, the interviewee often contributed to humanity in a way that was kind. Second, the interviewees talked about how kindness was a quality they sought in others. They avoided individuals who were not kind. Third, before they could be kind to others, they were kind to themselves. Many scheduled time during the day or week that was devoted to them being kind to themselves. This “self-care” could have been down time, meditation, time with friends, or whatever brought then joy.

I have since investigated kindness and have realized that kindness is very powerful and it is key to a meaningful life. It is essential to have kindness. It not only takes one out of the fight-or-flight mode when one is around it but when a person is kind, it’s a sign of strength. It not only feels good to be kind but It’s a sign of confidence. It’s also a way to feel connected to another person. It essentially comes down to respect. People, regardless of they differ in ideology, education, or background, all deserve respect. They are human beings and at the core of any and all interactions is kindness and respect.

3.     Which element was most difficult to describe or put into context?  Why? 

The most difficult element to write about and describe was spirituality. This chapter required that I write it, put it aside, and then rewrite it. It required more thought and consideration than I had envisioned. While the other chapters came from ideas that made sense and were based on many years of experience, my spirituality chapter was hard to explain. I knew that I had to better understand my own spirituality to write this chapter.   

The reason this was especially difficult for me was because of my upbringing and my career.  I am a physician-scientist and in my field, the divine is not discussed and it is not viewed as a part of life.  It is too abstract and not able to be measured, so for many, it must not exist. In addition to spirituality not being a part of my career, it was not something that either of my parents believed in. My mother did not believe in any religion or the presence of the divine. My father mocked any mention of miracles or supernatural events. 

I have since realized that the divine plays a larger role in our lives than we are aware of. I also believe that things don’t happen to you, but they happen to you. I also believe that a lot of the “challenges” that come your way, come because the divine feels that you can handle them.

4.     How did your views change regarding these elements from before doing this research and after? 

I always thought that having wisdom was all or nothing, that you either had it or not. I explain this in the first chapter of the book. I did not realize that there were many dimensions and elements to wisdom. My research found these dimensions and also found that while one person may be strong in one dimension, they may be weak in another.

I also discovered that having wisdom equates to having a state of peace and contentment – a knowing that things will work themselves out. The fascinating individuals I talked to were very happy and calm. They felt that emotions can often get in the way and may not be helpful in one’s journey. They also did not seem to take things so seriously. What was most interesting was their interest in wanting to be more than wanting to do.

5.     You state that people reading this book should revisit the book often.  Why is that?

One’s perspective of a given element will change over time. For example, a person in their 20s will not think about their spirituality much but as they age they may start to question their existence and the meaning of life and the divine.

Also, the book gives people a sense of hope and optimism.  When one is encountering challenging times, reading this book can help them “re-focus” and give them perspective.

Finally, the book can serve as a life manual. Life is a journey and while some are lucky to go on this journey with a friend, partner, or relative, not all have such a companion. This book can serve as a companion of life. 

6.     Following your research, do you believe that the purpose of life is to attain wisdom, or do we use wisdom for the purpose of attempting to understand the meaning of life?  Or both?  Why? 

This is a question I have asked myself often. I would say that the answer is both. One should approach life experiences as learning opportunities. The opportunities serve a purpose that may or may not be obvious. For example, a person may be diagnosed with a disease that changes the way they view health and wellness. This disease modifies their perspective and their attitude about life. They are such a changed person following the disease that they can’t imagine ever not having the disease. The disease was a “horrible” situation that gave them so much, like a gift. 

The second part of the wisdom question is in regard to whether wisdom can help with understanding the meaning of life. Having some of the elements or strengthening some of the elements can only help a person view life experiences positively. If a person were to approach a life obstacle with resilience (element 1) and positivity (element 3) that would help one manage life’s ebbs and flows with more grace.  Having wisdom will teach others that an obstacle is a challenge they will overcome. The obstacle is not a disaster but an opportunity.

7.     You discuss the interconnectedness of these elements.  Why is it important for readers to understand how each of these elements are interconnected?

They are all interconnected in that you can’t have one without many of the other elements. As I found, one element may be stronger than others but having one element most likely means that they have other elements, as well.

For example, being resilient can be achieved with more grace if one is positive. The way one views life is different when one is positive. Another example is being spiritual, which depends on being curious and creative. When one thinks of the divine, they can use their imagination and think beyond the physical world. A final example is being humble. This is an element that overlaps greatly with kindness. By being humble, one is kind towards and considerate of another person. Humility and kindness allow for a way to connect with one another. Tolerance also overlaps with kindness. A kind person is interested in other people and is tolerant of those who look and/or act “differently.”

8.     Do you think each person reading this will discover their own definition of wisdom?  Why?

Yes. Each person will see what works for them. The book will teach them about the elements and they can decide what elements they are good at and what elements they need to build on. This “custom” formula will help them come up with their own definition of wisdom and the meaning of their life.

This is why this book is so profound, it is not implying that wisdom is an all or nothing phenomenon but instead is a set of elements.  The project proves that wisdom is not a “one size fits all” game and just like we are all different, so is our sense of the world and wisdom.

The book is also helpful in that it does not imply that a person needs to have all elements. We interviewed 60 wise individuals and only one seemed to master all of the elements. This person taught wisdom to individuals above the age of sixty, so wisdom was his life’s focus.

9.  What do you hope readers will take away from this book?

I have said many times that my goal in doing this work and writing this book is not to sell books and make money. My goal is to change lives. By reading this book, I want readers to realize that there is more to life than the glitz and glamour promoted on the internet, and that success looks different for everyone. Success is different for every person and it is linked to living a more meaningful life.

I also hope that this book will help readers realize that their thoughts and actions can influence their lives as well as the lives of others.

Ultimately, I hope that this book reminds people that meaning and happiness are more important to life than external factors.

10.  Where can people purchase Common Wisdom?

Starting on March 19, it will be sold on Amazon. It will also be available on other websites and in bookstores throughout the country in the near future.

 MEET DR. LAURA GABAYAN

Dr. Laura Gabayan is a world-renowned physician and researcher.  Regarded internationally as an expert in the field of emergency medicine, she has received multiple research grants and awards for her work. She has also published dozens of papers cited by hundreds of researchers.  She has now applied her scientific expertise to study the concept of wisdom.  This discovery resulted in a first-of-its-kind multi-year research effort dubbed The Wisdom Project.  It was designed with scientific rigor in mind and geared towards answering some basic questions:  How is wisdom defined?  What constitutes wisdom?  How can we harness the power of wisdom to improve our everyday lives?  Her work involves extensive interviews of 60 wise individuals. She shares the insights in her book Common Wisdom. The knowledge shared in this book is priceless and timeless.

https://lauragabayan.com/