I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR MY BEAUTIFUL OASIS OF FLESH
I praise my own geography at last …
I am so grateful for my beautiful oasis of flesh which carries me about in this garden of life.
Each little dimple and wrinkle, each crevice and valley all my own.
There is no where else on earth I could find a place such as this, so alive, so divine and uniquely me.
I rub my hands gently absorbing the stories it tells me of holding life and birthing babies, slicing and taking away my gallbladder, walking up mountains, climbing tall trees and jumping off.
— True self-care is about holistic health. Jill Kay recently introduced me to Arbonne, the #1 global brand for healthy living inside and out. I tried the products and loved them! Check out their certified vegan, cruelty-free, gluten-free, nontoxic products by clicking HERE. You will be very surprised! —
I remember walking across coals and never being burnt. My spirit telling me to go ahead, because it was all an illusion anyway.
My beloved body carries me to and through every moment there is and beyond, allowing me to respond to life and its glorious magnificence. Feeling the wet grass beneath my feet, snowflakes coating my hair.
I inhale the fragrance of Freesias, appreciate their vibrant colors and taste chocolate upon my lips, all with this sacred vessel in which I can experience the Divine and the all which I am! I praise my own geography at last!
This article was written by Morgine Jurdan
Click HERE to Learn more about Morgine’s work.
WEBSITE: https://morginejurdan.com/
I LOVE ME…
For everything I am
for everything i am not
I love me
at my best
and
at my worst
I love me
smiling frowning laughing
playing screaming crying pounding
I am always Grace
no matter what face I wear
you are my reflection
and I am yours
I love me
for the Sake of Loving
for the Honor and Appreciation
I feel and experience
fully embracing
all of me
for in Receiving
All I am
in
Every Precious Moment
nothing gets wasted
all of me remains
Whole and Perfect
held in the universal heart
where the Love
which is always embracing me
the Love
which is everywhere and endless
allows space for
my Grace to grow
and know itself fully
once again.
I am so Grateful
I am extended the gift
of my friendship
so i can dance into the beauty
I truly am
This article was written by Morgine Jurdan
Click HERE to Learn more about Morgine’s work.
WEBSITE: https://morginejurdan.com/
MINDFUL MOVEMENT
THE MOST VALUABLE EXERCISE YOU’LL EVER PRACTICE
There is a single, small difference between the people that "do" and the people that "don't".
It's the difference between strength and weakness, progress and stagnation, success and failure.
Each and every one of us has it, have used it, and have used it successfully – every single time.
And every single time – we have an overwhelming sense of accomplishment, our efforts are justified, and we bask in the glory of a tough job well done, and done well enough to justify its means.
There are several single words that sufficiently describe this characteristic; though for some reason these words don't sound as potent and powerful as they did when we were children.
Flow – Presence – Concentration - Focus – Attuned – Attention
In descending order, these are my six measured by depth. On their own, any single one of these is sufficient in their effect on an outcome, though in this context "Presence" is more appropriate.
********************
As it relates to wellness, health, and fitness there is not a single person that ever got lucky by accident… not one.
Whoever has achieved a deliberate outcome was present in all of the decisions responsible for creating that particular outcome. They felt, they focused on what they were doing when they were doing it. These people didn't necessarily focus on fitness and health every waking moment, they just focused on it when they were doing it – they were Present. This presence-of-mind / presence-of-moment slowly and eventually permeates into other relevant moments, naturally and otherwise effortlessly bringing them sufficiently close to their intended destination.
This Presence in their current moment afforded them an advantage that without, there would be no success.
They're paying attention to what they're doing while they're doing it, then they're present in each moment that arrives after that… every meal, every activity, every set, every rep.
********************
Whether practical, physical, spiritual or emotional - effort and intensity are relative and subjective; some days hard is easy, and other days easy is hard – this is true for everyone. But, 100% is 100% no matter which way you cut it. If you only have 70% today - great, then do 100% of that. If today's a good day and you're bringing 105%, give 100% of that, too. The only way you know what you have is if you're paying attention to what you're feeling at this very moment.
Presence is critical in all things we hope to improve about ourselves, inward or outward. If you want to maximize your efforts in eating right, then you'll need to be Present when you're choosing your meals. If you want to maximize your efforts in being a more attentive father, then you'll need to be Present when the opportunity arises to shoot some hoops with your six-year-old son. If you want to maximize your efforts in having a stronger connection to God or the Universe, then you need to be Present when there's an opportunity to tune-in to those vibrations.
It's astounding how quickly things change when you pay attention to the moments that determine their influence.
For a moment… think… think about a single and seemingly inconsequential change you could make that only you might recognize but would give you satisfaction in making this one thing different than it is now.
Now think of just one thing that frequently reminds you of its current state.
Your homework is to look for the opportunities that arise where you can choose to change its very history and see what happens.
This is the easy part – the hard part is going to be spreading your awareness to every part of your life, once you've seen how mundane a task it really is.
This article was written by Matthew A. Scarfo
Click HERE to Learn more about Matthew’s work.
https://www.linkedin.com/in/mattscarfo/
TRIAL AND ERROR: BROKEN METABOLISM AND HEALING
I remember going through different websites, looking for a trainer that would offer a workout and a meal program. Someone I trusted or had seen before. So, there was my solution: Jillian Michaels! I had heard about her from the show The Biggest Loser and had started seeing her supplements and other products at the store. So, I thought I'd give her a shot.
She had everything I needed on her website. An app that would help me download the workout schedule and programs, as well as the recipes to eat healthy and be in the best shape of my life. I have to admit, at the beginning it was daunting! I started off by throwing away all the junk food I had in my kitchen cabinets and fridge. Then, I restocked on the ingredients I would need for my healthy meals.
I was pretty consistent and disciplined with the meal plan and workout program Jillian had chosen for me and had started to notice positive changes. I also incorporated yoga and running into my workout program.
The last thing I added to my already-dialed-in-new-lifestyle was supplements such as multi-vitamins made from foods and not synthetics, organic protein powders and fat burners. It was these last ones that took my metabolism out of whack. The results were ugly: Insomnia and Amenorrhea. I was not dying, but I was sending my body the signal that I was. So, what did I do? I looked for help. I wanted to treat my insomnia first, so, I went to different doctors and they all told me to take melatonin and relax. They did some thyroid testing on me and it all came back fine. So, they assumed it was all in my head. I tried getting a different opinion from another doctor, but I was told the same thing. This time, though, I was sent back home with a benzodiazepine. Pretty much, a drug that would make me unconscious so I could "sleep". I had to taper to get off this medication once I was able to "sleep" again. My insomnia got "fixed" after a month of sleeping only 2-5 hours per night. The only thing that didn't get fixed was my amenorrhea. It took me 5 years to get that fixed. And, along those 5 years, I experienced some more insomnia.
It was then that I started looking for more experts in the Eastern/Functional medicine atmosphere and, only then, was I able to understand what was going on with me and how I could fix myself. I learned that what I ate would impact my sleep cycle and overall metabolism. And, I learned that carbs were not the enemy, that the good kind were actually needed by our bodies to create some hormones as well as the oh-so-feared-and-hated fat!
My fat journey started with Dave Asprey, then continued not only with him but with Dr. Joseph Mercola, Robb Wolf, Dr. Sarah Ballentyne and Dr. David Perlmutter. Most of these experts always followed a principle: Eat whole, gluten-free foods and listen to your body. That's what I had been missing for years: Listening to my body! We lack that mind-body connection that is so needed in order to be in harmony with our bodies, relationships and overall life. After cracking the code for what works for my body and what makes my metabolism happy, I knew I had to visit my demons and start working on my psychology and spirituality... And so, I started my meditation journey, which took me to places I never thought it would....
This article was written by Michelle Schacherer
Click HERE to Learn more about Michelle’s work.
WEBSITE: http://mschacherercrossfitter.blogspot.com
ORGASMS IN MY SALAD BOWL
Mother earth
delightedly tickled
by birds pecking for insects
in her soft green grass
roots of trees
sensuously digging deeply
into her rich brown earthen body
seeds bursting with new green life
twining up through the soil
undulating contracting stimulations
nematodes and earth worms crawling
animals digging sensuously or hard
burrowing creatures living inside her
sun stimulating growth
warming her body
and all that grows there
rain massaging her soil
into luscious soft wet mud
the cooling blankets of snow
allowing for pleasurable rest
orgasms of delight
beneath my naked feet
Bees sensually dancing
on a flower’s face
exchanging pollen
shudders of ecstatic delight
butterflies kissing blossoms
satisfying rapture peaks
as hummingbirds suck their nectar
spiders weave their webs
bugs joyfully adventure
between the petals and leaves
in the bark of trees
passion amidst the plants
zest and joy climaxing
in the sunlight
Luscious sounds
fertilizing flowers and trees
and all the plants i eat
birds songs
a chorus of frogs
crickets singing coyotes howling
love making in the moonlight
rainbows
the climaxing dance of the sun
caressing the rain
wind’s erotic play
with the leaves of trees
embracing clouds in the air
blowing the ocean’s waves
here and there
Orgasms in my salad bowl
exhilarating joyful
pinnacles of delight
eager avid eternal
exchanges of love
satisfying passions
the rapture and glow
wherever i go
nature in love with itself
in love with each other
my salad
lovingly prepared
feels so alive
so ripe and juicy
orgasmic vibrations
still flowing to me
and through me
as we become one
again and again
i pause and breathe in
the grace and love i feel
as orgasms explode
inside my body
and the circe begins again
This article was written by Morgine Jurdan
Click HERE to Learn more about Morgine’s work.
WEBSITE: https://morginejurdan.com/
SYNERGISTIC LIFESTYLE: PUTTING EVERYTHING TOGETHER
Changes are not easy; they bring with them a lot of resistance. However, I have learned to embrace them throughout the years, but, while they happen, they make me uneasy. They bring uncertainty, which drives me crazy. Nevertheless, whenever I find myself anxious about what the future will bring, I sit down, meditate and repeat the following mantra: "I trust". And I really do trust, I know that no matter what, the universe will never take me to a worse place, quite the contrary, I know it'll be to a better one.
And so, it was. After saying good-bye to toxic relationships, toxic environment I saw my life change for the better. The new changes I made included hanging out with positive people, people who were into health and nutrition, spiritual people, people who appreciated the different cultures of the world, open-minded people, and successful people. They say that you're the average of the 5 people you hang out the most with, so, I became very careful about who I let into my life, and, most importantly, who I spent my time with.
Moreover, I changed my environment for good: I got rid of blue lights and added incandescent lightbulbs to my house, Himalayan salt lamps, and an essential oil diffuser; I added blackout curtains to my room, and started using a night mask when I went to bed to make sure my body got adequate sleep; I made sure that the products I used on my body did not include SLS, Fragrances, nor a bunch of ingredients I was unable to pronounce (this was for anything touching my body such as shampoos, conditioners, deodorants, lotions, etc.); furthermore, I got rid of so much clutter in my living spaces: I kissed good-bye a lot of things I didn't use or old things which were only taking up room and not allowing new things to come.
When it comes to my diet, I went 100% organic and gluten-free, and reduced to almost 0 my sugar and vegetable oil consumption. Unfortunately, some foods will include these ingredients which makes it really hard to eliminate them from your diet. Some food examples where these ingredients lurk include: salad dressings, chocolate nut milks, bread, etc.
At the end, a major makeover was needed. And I took the same principles I used in fitness, diet and spiritualism to my professional life. I realized that drastic, overnight changes were destructive and that milestones needed to be achieved before reaching the big goals. I learned to give the best of myself that I could to every job I was doing, to care for it and to find answers whenever I didn't have them. I just had in place a system that worked in one aspect of my life and that I could replicate in other aspects of my life.
Life was good, life is good and I wake up excited every day excited, wondering what the next thing around the corner will be, what life will bring my way and how I will interpret it. I learned that I cannot change reality, so, I have to accept it. However, one thing I can change: the perspective or lens through which I see reality. That has helped me stay positive no matter how bad the outcome may be. If something's going to be bad, I try to find the silver lining in the bad thing. It works like a charm, so I invite you to try doing the same and see how the sad veil lifts up! :)
This article was written by Michelle Schacherer
Click HERE to Learn more about Michelle’s work.
WEBSITE: http://mschacherercrossfitter.blogspot.com
LOVE IS A STARTING POINT FOR ACTION
“All you need is love,” sang the Beatles many decades ago. It’s a song still sung today. And for good reason. The tune is catchy, and the message is hopeful: “There’s nothing you can do that can’t be done.”
Were it that simple. Love, after all, is our greatest joy. But it can also be complex and complicated. Loving someone “for better or worse, in sickness and in health,” means taking the good with the bad. And that’s not always easy.
Many—if not most—of us will have to take care of the person we love during an illness. It might be for a day, a week or even longer. Some may find it a daunting challenge. For me, it’s a call to action.
Over the past two and a half decades, my husband has been hospitalized many times. Often, it’s involved life-threatening illness with long periods of hospitalization and recuperation. In times like that, I do everything in my power to help him get better. Love is the starting point for advocacy.
Along the way, I have learned a lot about the hospital setting and the very real impact that families can have in making sure their loved ones get the best care. Hospitals are bureaucratic and scary places. For patients and their families, it can feel like being tourists lost in a strange land, not knowing the customs, the language or the culture.
Patients are weak and flat on their backs. They are usually in no position to advocate for themselves. Doctors are busy, rushing from one patient to the next; nurses are stretched, trying to meet the many needs of their patients.
Families can make a difference. They can represent the patient’s wishes and needs when their loved one is unable to speak for him or herself. Knowing the patient better than anyone else in the hospital counts for a lot when navigating the impersonal environment of a hospital setting. Families—working as members of the care team—can also connect the dots because doctors, quite honestly, don’t always communicate well with one another.
Families can fill in the blanks when the sick patient doesn’t fully comprehend everything being said or is not able to remember it later. They also can bring information, perspective and insight that patients may forget or are uncomfortable sharing themselves.
And when the patient goes home, continued care must involve the family to ensure instructions are followed regarding medication, doctor visits, exercise, restrictions, and more.
Much is written about patient-centered medicine. But research shows that patient and family-centered medicine provides the best clinical outcomes, increases patient satisfaction, lowers costs, reduces risks of readmission and can even save lives.
Families can and do make a real difference. They start with love and build from there. There’s one more line from the Beatle’s song that applies here: [There’s] … “no one you can save that can't be saved.”
The one you help save just may be the one you love most.
# # #
Bonnie Friedman is author of Hospital Warrior: How to Get the Best Care for Your Loved One and host of the podcast Hospital Warrior: Advocates and Experts on the Whole Care Network.
This article was written by Bonnie Friedman
Click HERE to Learn more about Bonnie’s work.
WEBSITE: www.hospitalwarrior.com
ECONOMICS OF THE HUMAN MOVEMENT SYSTEM
We know that if we practice something often enough that perfection is inevitable. We know this because science has tested this hypothesis an infinite amount of times throughout the ages. Frequent repetition increases our familiarity, familiarity increases efficiencies, efficiencies reinforce familiarity, and so on.
Since we can predict certain outcomes and these outcomes are measurable, we can reasonably approach any activity or exercise (physical or otherwise) to guarantee the best outcome. Reasonable in a way that maximizes our abilities thereby maximizing our outcomes.
Practice is simply recreating a pattern over-and-over, again. It trains the nervous system to become exceedingly familiar with the movement-related aspects of physical performance. And, it trains the brain to become exceedingly familiar with reasoning & learning-related tasks. It simply doesn’t matter what the activity is, it is simply just a matter of your level of acquaintance. Repeat something often enough, and eventually you’ll elicit “muscle memory” (I really don’t like using that term).
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Potential > Memory
I don’t like using that term because a muscle cannot remember anything, period. This “memory” - or familiar movement pattern – occurs when the repetition induces certain efficiencies to develop which allow for the brain to do something else while the body is executing a certain string of commands that have already been programmed and tested. We perfect an activity by practicing it so much that when the initiative spark fires in the brain it sets off a harmonious cascade of precise and predictable nerve impulses. These impulses fire sequences of muscle contractions to cause precise movements. It would be far more accurate to call this phenomenon "muscle-potential", though the latter iteration doesn’t quite sound so appealing.
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Efficiency Over All
Regarding movement, the human body wants to do one thing, and one thing only. It wants to preserve its valuable resources. Economy – same activity, less energy. Same result, fewer resources. Conservation is the only motivation – do something often enough and it will take less time, less thought, and eventually less work.
Your body's primary motivation when performing any task boils down to just one thing – economy - Same activity, less energy. Same outcome, fewer resources. Conservation is key. Get more familiar with doing something and it'll take less time, less thought, and less work.
We've all experienced this in some form or another: whether with a Yo-yo, Rubix Cube, walking to jogging to running (did you know that you burn about the same number of calories WALKING one mile as you do RUNNING one mile? It’s true).
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We occupy this highly specialized, highly adaptive machine whose primary objective is preservation - resource-preservation. To put simply, its objective is to use the minimum resources needed to complete a task, and not a single iota more. This is true from both a metabolic standpoint as well as a mechanical one.
For many people, they’ve been trying to lose weight for what seems like an eternity but because this machine opts for efficiency – the harder you work, the better you get at working hard – AND the fewer resources you’ll use to accomplish the same task. Unless of course, you force the machine to continually adapt. How do you do this? Well, you're going to have to work harder than you did yesterday, every single day.
One Layer Deeper
This neural reprogramming is the first (and least demanding) attempt to make whatever action that you're practicing economical enough to preserve your body's precious and hard-earned resources.
Generally speaking, it's only after the neural improvements begin to maximize that the body begins to explore other avenues to improve the efficiencies of exercise.
This article was written by Matthew A. Scarfo
Click HERE to Learn more about Matthew’s work.
https://www.linkedin.com/in/mattscarfo/
I AM THE MAGIC IN THE BIRDS SINGING
I am the magic in the birds singing
I am the colors in the rainbow
I color the sky with my radiance
and i fill the forest with my loam
I am the mountains meeting the sky
all day long
for in one drop of water
and in one grain of sand
in one cell of my body
the world
is made whole again
as i breathe
I take in life
and let it go
my hair, my skin, my breath
fall upon the earth
composting into soil
eaten by worms and bugs
eaten by animals and birds
who
living in trees
fertilize the tree
with their excrement
and the tree
growing fruit i eat
eating myself
again and again
becoming whole
and being
a part of it all
I am the beginning
I am the end
without an end
the deepest feeling anyone has
the deepest love
the deepest pain
the greatest longing
the peace beyond transcendence
bliss
anguish
terror
fear
they are all me
they are all mine
all Divine
all that I AM
There is no richness i cannot have
there is no pain i cannot feel
there are no lines
no divisions
no time
no separations
i come from a place
that remembers it all
and into which
all life flows
because
Love is all there is
and in the
moment of true reflection
I fall down
and weep
in the arms
of myself
This article was written by Morgine Jurdan
Click HERE to Learn more about Morgine’s work.
WEBSITE: https://morginejurdan.com/
HEALING STARTS FROM THE INSIDE: MY SPIRITUAL JOURNEY
Sometimes in order to fix a bigger problem, we need to start by fixing ourselves. And that's where I had to start to release all the mental chains I had that prevented me from being myself. These included persons and ideas that kept me from reaching my highest potential.
The first thing I had to do was love myself. I know, you can ask anyone if they love themselves and they will say "yes", but, once they start digging deeper, they realize that they haven't really been loving themselves. In the same way that healing and personal growth require introspection and care, building a business aligned with your spiritual journey calls for choosing partners that resonate with your values. Looking into Zenbusiness reviews can offer insights into a supportive, efficient service to help manifest your vision into reality.
Someone who loves themselves would never allow anyone else to do something harmful to them. One important thing that helped me prevent this was when I started saying "no". It was not easy, but it has been one of the best things I have ever done for myself. What I realized after I started saying "no", was that I was saying "yes" to something I liked and that made me feel fine.
Another thing I did was start a meditation practice that I religiously continue to this day. Every morning, you'll find me taking at least 5 minutes to do conscious breathing, to be grateful, or to forgive. The 2 things that have benefitted me the most have been gratitude and forgiveness. Through gratitude, I have been able to really appreciate the small things in life: a warm cup of coffee, a goat milk yogurt (I mean, how often do you find that while traveling?!), people who love and support me for who I am, the food on my table, having a roof over my head, my health... Ultimately, being thankful for the magic and perfection of life on earth as a whole. Through forgiveness, instead, I learned to forgive myself and everything I've done wrongly. To forgive my mind always judging me and always criticizing every move I make or the body I have. I learned to forgive my parents for the way they reacted to my weight issues while I was a kid since their frustration didn't allow them to see the damage they were doing to me; I forgave anyone who had hurt me out of their own pain, because it was not them doing something bad to me on purpose, it was their own ignorance and suffering that made them act like that. Forgiveness is a selfish act. We forgive to free ourselves from the emotional burden, not to make someone else happy. So, if you haven't tried it out yet, now's the time to start!
Meditation and spiritualism, besides reinforcing the body-mind connection, helped me connect better to the world. Thanks to that, I no longer see things as independent, I see them as part of an interdependent system. This just became more evident after my mom passed away. An event like this transforms you either for your best or worse. But, in my case, it helped me learn that everything in life is energy: yourself, what you see, what you can't see, and your thoughts. Matter doesn't disappear, it just transforms. And, that's why, even if I miss my mom every day, I know that she's everywhere: In the air I breathe, the smiling child running in the garden, the tree I touch, etc.
Knowing how the type of energy I surround myself with and the one I vibrate on are important for my overall life, I decided to change my environment, and this included my relationships. It was not easy since I had to cut ties with many people and make drastic changes, but the results were astonishing...
This article was written by Michelle Schacherer
Click HERE to Learn more about Michelle’s work.
WEBSITE: http://mschacherercrossfitter.blogspot.com
FAKE IT ‘TIL YOU MAKE IT!
Fake it ‘til you make it! That adage of the 1970’s may seem like a cliché now, a silly relic of a bygone era. But in reality, we fake it regularly when we lack full confidence but still manage to push ourselves to rise to an occasion—a job interview, negotiating the price for a new car or holding our ground in an important discussion.
Many people find it intimidating to talk to doctors. They get tongue-tied, afraid to ask questions or worry they’ll say the wrong thing. Research bears out the phenomenon. One study compared the frightened behavior of patients to that of hostages bargaining for release.
Whether you are the patient or it’s someone you love, getting good medical care shouldn’t sink to that level. That means speaking up even when you feel nervous. Doctors often rush from one patient to the next; some are gentle in their dealings, but others seem brusque and impatient. Patients and families can be left feeling too demeaned to even ask a question before the doctor is out the door.
That’s when it’s time to fake it. But you must be prepared. Patient advocacy requires many things – time, attention and perseverance to start. Diplomacy and respect are other essential ingredients. Effective advocacy also requires a strong dose of chutzpah, that wonderful Yiddish word blending personal guts and gumption.
I have been advocating for my husband for more than a quarter-century through multiple hospitalizations and illnesses. One thing I have learned is that my role is as important as the doctors and nurses in ensuring he gets the best medical care. Acting on that knowledge means working with medical professionals as an equal, trusting my instincts and speaking up when I have questions or think something is wrong.
One of the most important jobs of the advocate is connecting the dots – asking the right questions, paying attention to details and making sure that the entire medical team is on the same page. Taking up the charge requires confidence. That can start with basic research to better understand the patient’s condition and be poised to ask smart questions.
Keeping good notes and staying organized helps the advocate pay attention to details and follow up on questions or concerns. Doctors don’t always communicate well with one another, and nurses are sometimes left out of the loop. Issues can fall between the cracks, and misunderstandings can affect patient care. A well-informed advocate can help keep communication flowing.
Advocates who are strong, persistent and professional get a better response from doctors too. When you act with diplomacy and respect, you are more likely to receive those same courtesies in return.
When you put it all together – education, organization and perseverance – confidence in your role as an advocate can grow. The more you do it, the better you get at it. Remember, you know the patient better than anyone else in the hospital. That counts for a lot in a setting that can seem bureaucratic and impersonal.
Draw upon your strengths, life experiences, street smarts and common sense. You can apply that sense of assurance to your advocacy role.
Prepare questions in advance; practice making your case in front of a mirror. If need be, assume you are an actor taking on a role. Remember that even a shaky start is better than no start at all. Before you know it, you won’t have to fake it at all.
Bonnie Friedman is the author of Hospital Warrior: How to Get the Best Care for Your Loved One and host of the podcast Hospital Warrior: Advocates and Experts on the Whole Care Network.
This article was written by Bonnie Friedman
Click HERE to Learn more about Bonnie’s work.
WEBSITE: www.hospitalwarrior.com
THE SECRET OF WAITING
It’s one that every feline, domestic or wild, knows.
I’ve only been truly practicing waiting for a couple of years but in the beginning, waiting felt counterintuitive. I was quite comfortable being busy and spontaneous, slow to trust that waiting would yield any benefit to my goals or my life. When the idea was introduced through Human Design, I might never have trusted the concept of waiting had I not already experienced firsthand success using other Human Design tools.
I had always prided myself as a person willing to “jump in,” ready to take risks. Trying to prove myself, I experienced one failed enterprise after another. Naturally spontaneous, I trusted others more and never waited. I never graced myself with enough time, time that would eventually expose flaws or false foundations that were there from the beginning. The idea of slowing down, stopping, terrified me. I was mentally certain that if I did not act, the moment would be lost and I would lose out.
I felt courageous every time, diving in without question until years of hard work and effort melted away along with my confidence. Either betrayed, ashamed, or embarrassed, facing reality was retribution for what I eventually felt was a stupid decision. Licking my wounds, I didn’t wait but instead jumped into the next “greatest” opportunity. It was a cyclical nightmare.
Until I met Human Design and started waiting.
I now trust that “doing nothing” is “doing everything” as I move closer and closer to living the life I’ve always dreamed I was capable of living. Waiting gives me a chance for clarity, for personal honesty, for self-acceptance. Amazingly, the correct things find me. I trust myself and in the comfort of my own skin say “no” with certainty and “yes” with confidence.
I have to admit it was hard as heck in the beginning. Fears were amplified and frustrations increased my anxiety until I experienced results. In short order, however, practicing it renewed and saved my relationships, my health, and my sanity a thousand times over. Frustrated far less frequently these days, I am at peace and trust the unknown.
There is a traffic light near our home. It sits on an extremely busy street where drivers often run through red lights rushing by at speeds of up to 60 mph. I don’t trust green lights any longer. Instead of “go” they mean “wait and move cautiously.” That little shift in my perception has saved my life, literally and metaphorically, more than once.
Not everything is life-threatening and green lights can mean go; but in the words of my mentor and dear friend, Mary Ann Winniger, Wait! Trust that life knows where you live. I would add, “Enter the intersection slowly!” It’s a wonderful thing to discover that life is on your side and has been patiently waiting for you to slow down and join it!
If you’d like to know more about Human Design and how it can improve your life, please contact me at info@lydlifemap.com or visit my website at www.lydlifemap.com.
http://key-to-you.com/images/Waiting_song.mp3
This article was written by Candace Conradi.
Click HERE to learn more about Candace’s work.
WEBSITES: https://www.lydlifemap.com/
https://www.candaceconradi.com/
LOOK OUT YOUR WINDOW
When its early or late, I can’t see outside.
It’s dark and that means the outside just hides.
But the moment it’s light, great things come in view
My window shows me the things that are new.
When I look out my window I see cars drive by.
And with eyes looking up I see airplanes on high.
When I look out of my window I see wind in the trees.
The branches all dance as it moves through the leaves.
When I look out of my window, I see rain and some snow.
The cars and the trucks have to go really slow.
When I look out my window, I see people walking.
With arms always moving – they never stop talking.
When I look out my window, it’s my neighbors I see
And they always do smile and wave right back at me.
When I look out my window, I see kids on the bus.
Laughing and talking with so much to discuss.
When I look out my window I see men who are mowing
the yards and the grass that never stops growing.
When I look out of my window, I see squirrels and some birds
They get a lot done without using our words.
When I look out my window I see big and small dogs
I see all sorts of birds and some snakes and some frogs.
When I look out my window, I see flowers so bright.
Red and dark blue, yellow, orange and some white.
When I look out my window, thick clouds and some thinner,
Go racing by, now who is the winner?
When I look out my window, I see runners jog
They run in the rain, in the wind and the fog.
When I stand at my window, something important I see,
Dad’s car comes in view, coming home to see me.
I spend time at my window, stand still and don’t race.
This is my special and very remarkable place.
To watch all that happens and to learn about me.
There is so much to watch, to notice and see.
So I stand at my window and take it all in.
I watch, look and listen, and take life for a spin.
This article was written by Jay Forte
Click HERE to Learn more about Jay’s work
WEBSITE: https://thefortefactor.com/
REDUCING EMOTIONAL EATING
Having high emotional granularity is a vital tool for reducing emotional eating. The term was coined by Northeastern University Psychology Professor Lisa Feldman Barrett shortly after the turn of the century and refers to the ability to recognize, identify and express a full range of emotions. People with high emotional granularity have “finely tuned feelings.” They value emotions and are in touch with them most of the time. Moreover, they don’t lump all emotions together, but feel and can describe their nuances. Upset might be parsed as frightened, dismayed or exasperated. Angry might be viewed as frustrated, helpless or fearful.
Says Barrett, “Emotional granularity isn’t just about having a rich vocabulary; it’s about experiencing the world, and yourself, more precisely. This can make a difference in your life. In fact, there is growing scientific evidence that precisely tailored emotional experiences are good for you, even if those experiences are negative.” (“Are You in Despair? That’s Good,” The NY Times, 6/3/16, http://clbb.mgh.harvard.edu/are-you-in-despair-thats-good/#more-7340, accessed 1/29/19).
“According to a collection of studies, finely grained, unpleasant feelings allow people to be more agile at regulating their emotions, less likely to drink excessively when stressed and less likely to retaliate aggressively against someone who has hurt them…Perhaps surprisingly, the benefits of high emotional granularity are not only psychological. People who achieve it are also likely to have longer, healthier lives. They go to the doctor and use medication less frequently, and spend fewer days hospitalized for illness. Cancer patients, for example, have lower levels of harmful inflammation when they more frequently categorize, label and understand their emotions.”
There’s evidence that emotional granularity improves mental health. Higher emotional granularity translates to better coping skills and, therefore, fewer maladaptive behaviors such as addictions. Relationships also improve when people are attuned to emotions.
How emotionally granular are you? Do you have difficulty identifying your feelings? Do you ignore them? Lump them together? Therapy can help because it provides a safe place to learn about and discuss emotions. By becoming more tuned in to them, you’ll up your emotional intelligence and do less mindless or binge eating.
This article was written by Karen R. Koenig
Click HERE to Learn more about Karen’s work.
WEBSITES: http://www.karenrkoenig.com/
http://www.nicegirlsfinishfat.com/
WHEN IT’S JUST NOT YOUR DAY
I knew it first thing, when I started the day
That things were not going to go in my way.
I tried to be happy and grateful, I say.
But I really knew, it was just not my day.
I tripped on the stairs and came down with a crash.
Into the sink went my phone, with a great splash.
The note for my teacher got thrown in the trash.
This day, I just knew, would not go by in a flash.
At school I forgot that my project was due.
At lunch they were serving a yucky beef stew.
In art class I spilled a container of glue.
Not a good day, this is something I knew.
My teacher seemed to just focus on me.
Telling and scolding is all I did see.
“Start over! Be quiet! Stand in line!” said she.
Today is not great, I bet you agree.
I missed the bus and walked home in the rain.
I stepped off the curb and gave my ankle a sprain.
I got soaked with the spray from a very fast train.
Today, you can see, is a very big pain.
Home and all wet, off to my room with a huff.
I needed a moment when feeling this gruff.
Things that had happened were so truly tough.
Today, on this day, I had just had enough.
Off to the kitchen with my head in my hands
Upset at a day that I did not understand.
How things can go so against all my plans.
Today, was the worst day in all of the land.
Mom asked, “What’s up, what’s making you sad?”
“Nothing,” I said, trying not to get mad.
“Tell me,” she said, “About the day that you had.”
Can we make it much better, or a little less bad?”
I shrugged then recounted without a delay
How everything seemed to just not go my way.
Not sure what could help or what thing she could say
That would improve this most terrible and horrible day.
She smiled and said, “Some days make you scream
They feel like an awful and really bad dream.
There one thing that makes it a bit less extreme
A bowl, no, a big bowl of your favorite ice cream.”
Two scoops and my mood changed, right on the spot.
We talked about things and what the day brought.
Some things just work out and some things just do not.
Life send what it sends, you get what you got.
Don’t argue and stress and get all distraught.
Be patient and learn from all you’ve been taught.
This article was written by Jay Forte
Click HERE to Learn more about Jay’s work.
WEBSITE: https://thefortefactor.com/
THE DEEP WELCOME OF FRIENDSHIP
Across the miles they drove, journeying four hours north on washboard roads until they reached this country hill.
“We want to talk about the conference,” they had said on the phone. “We can fill you in on the details in person. The more you know about us, the easier it will be for you to prepare.”
I heard their words, but I was deaf to their hearts, because as the date of their visit approached, the puddle of panic around me grew deeper and murkier. The faithless ponderings multiplied:
They’ll be sorry they traveled all this way to meet someone so ordinary. What if they want to quiz me on my theology? I’m sure they’ll take one look at my tiny kitchen and my beat up wood floors and decide that I’m a mess, too.
This, for me, has been the challenge of the Christian life: to boldly welcome others into the mess that is me, and then to trust – to trust that God will build a bridge between our hearts, and to trust that others will respond with acceptance and love.
As it happens, my new friends arrived a few minutes late – GPS’s aren’t much help out here! More important, though, when they showed up in my driveway, they did not arrive bearing an impossible yardstick or hearts of judgment. They were not expecting me to look or sound like a conference speaker or to live in a museum of Pinterest perfection.
We exchanged warm hugs and settled down to business. They shared their stories and described their community, drawing me into their fellowship of women:
the diligent seekers after Truth;
the heartsick lovers of prodigal children;
the faithful caregivers who bridge and mend the generations;
the patient prayer warriors who battle daily on behalf of unsaved husbands.
We broke zucchini bread together and my worries about my mum-jeans and sub-standard housekeeping practices were forgotten as we engaged in sincere prayer for the planning of the conference and for the women who would be challenged by the Truth.
I was the girl with the teakettle on the stove and my Canadian grandmother’s delicate cups and saucers all arranged to receive guests, but these women who had traveled across two state lines on an early Monday morning were the true extenders of hospitality.
They transcended geography, opened their hearts, and welcomed me into their lives in the spirit that Paul describes in Romans 15:7:
Therefore, receive one another just as Christ also received us, to the glory of God.
Stretching out both hands to receive the world, Jesus’ act of cross-shaped love still flattens the barriers that appear so insurmountable to this fearful and self-protective introvert. God is mightily glorified when, by grace, we reach across the artificial boundaries of politics, race, or denomination in order to truly “receive one another” in unity and acceptance.
Wanting to send my new friends on their way with sweetness, I pulled tiny jars of apple butter from my basement shelves. But the greater gift that day was offered to me — the priceless welcome and deep hospitality of friendship.
This article was written by Michele Morin
Click HERE to Learn more about Michele’s work.
WEBSITE: https://michelemorin.wordpress.com
RECOVERING FROM EATING DISORDER
Putting Emotions To Work To Overcome Your Eating Disorder
Whether you’re just beginning to address your under- or overeating problems or have been making steady progress over years or decades, there’s one area that you will have to come to terms with sooner or later to achieve full recovery. To achieve a satisfying, nourishing, happy, and successful life without food problems, you will have to learn how put your emotions to work for you. This means not dancing around them by eating or calorie counting, obsessing about what you can/can’t/should/shouldn’t eat, or focusing on whether the numbers on the scale are moving up or down.
For many disordered eaters, identifying and sitting with feelings is the last hurdle to becoming a “normal” eater. Most are willing and often eager to practice new food- and weight-related behaviors, such as making satisfying food choices, eating mindfully, taking larger or smaller bites, throwing out the scale, eating without distractions, taking deep breaths after each mouthful, and staying connected to the body’s pleasure center during the eating process. But most people with eating problems—actually, most people, period—have difficulty getting comfortable with feelings. It’s important for you to recognize that disordered eaters are far from the only ones who have difficulty handling emotions. To greater or lesser extent, everyone does.
Unfortunately, every time you use food (move toward or away from it) instead of feeling an authentic emotion, you miss an opportunity to discover something about what’s happening in your internal world. Think of your emotions as equivalent to your senses. The latter alert us to our reaction to our environment—thumbs up or thumbs down—through touch, smell, sight, hearing, and taste. Our feelings have a similar function as they provide us with information about our reaction to people and situations. The function of both our senses and our emotions is to move us toward pleasure and away from pain. Emotions help us decide what is self-threatening—smelling smoke and seeing flames across the room—and what is self-enhancing—sensory delight derived from gazing out over the ocean as gulls soar overhead and the sun dips into the sea.
— True self-care is about holistic health. Jill Kay recently introduced me to Arbonne, the #1 global brand for healthy living inside and out. I tried the products and loved them! Check out their certified vegan, cruelty-free, gluten-free, nontoxic products by clicking HERE. You will be very surprised! —
If you’re like most people, you don’t realize the value and purpose of emotions and assume they’re not important, or worse, that uncomfortable feelings should be avoided at all cost. But, I bet you’d never think of shutting off your senses and wandering through the world without them. Well, that’s exactly what you do every time you ignore or minimize a feeling.
What if emotions aren’t the demons you’ve made them out to be? What if emotions are your teachers and your care-takers? What if they’re not trash but treasures?
One of the reasons that emotions get a bad rap is that they can feel truly awful. We may believe that if something doesn’t feel good, it can’t be good, but this is far from the truth. There are lots of painful cures to what ails us that we tolerate because we know they are necessary and promote ultimate health and well-being—injections, dental fillings and implants, physical therapy, and surgery, to name a few. No one says, gee, terrific, I’m going to have my body sliced open today and then I’ll be in pain for weeks on end recovering. However, inspite of the fact that it’s often a nasty business, people schedule surgery because they know they’ll feel better in the long run.
The same is true of emotions. Just because they hurt or make you feel badly does not mean they are bad. Like musical notes and colors (and foods too!), there are no good or bad emotions. They’re what’s called value neutral. Think of them as messengers, giving you vital information about what’s happening within your internal landscape—you’re disappointed, ashamed, overwhelmed, overjoyed, furious, grief-stricken, content, shocked, revolted, elated, confused, lonely, excited, helpless. True, some of these feelings are excruciating and hard to bear, but they do pass and people survive them every day and have since the beginning of human existence. Half the battle is allowing yourself to be with your feelings without making judgments about them or the kind of person you are for having them. It’s a great deal easier to acknowledge, identify, experience, explore, and deal with feelings without all the associated criticisms you have of them or of yourself.
Recovering from an eating disorder means blossoming into a full, emotionally mature person. For that to happen, you must (yes, must) learn to experience all of your feelings; you can’t pick and choose. Becoming emotionally healthy is an all or nothing proposition, but one you can learn over time. If you believe you can’t bear your feelings alone, find a therapist who can guide you through them. Share your feelings with friends, start a journal, hug yourself, cry, holler til you’re hoarse, beat your pillow, sob til you’re exhausted.
At some point in recovery, you have to choose between food and feeling. You already know where your food obsession will lead you, so why not give feelings a try?
This article was written by Karen R. Koenig
Click HERE to Learn more about Karen’s work.
WEBSITES: http://www.karenrkoenig.com/
http://www.nicegirlsfinishfat.com/
UNDER ONE GREAT BIG SKY
No matter your work – if you build, write or fly.
No matter your race – if you’re a girl or a guy.
No matter if you’re bold, or tall or just shy
We show up each day, under the same great big sky.
Some try to say, that they know what’s right.
They push and control – they do things with might.
Some say, “Be like us or we can’t let you in.”
“And we don’t really like the the color of your skin.”
Some feel they were born better, more important or greater.
Some think it’s okay to be a big hater
Of people who are different, and those not so spry,
But we all live right here, under the same great big sky.
Some think they are better by the things that they own
Where they shop, what they buy, or how well they are known.
They compare and complain about all of the others.
They forget that down deep we are all truly brothers.
Not one of us is more special, not one wins the prize.
Not one has more value, or a right to despise.
Not one has more worth – let me just simplify,
We each show up now, under the same great big sky.
We are all different – the face, skin and the nose;
The successes and failures, the highs and the lows.
Down deep is your spark, a gift so divine.
Know it and live it; it’s yours and its mine.
You are amazing, great, awesome and blest.
You have strengths and big gifts, just like all of the rest.
If we’re all so amazing, I have to ask why
We can’t get along, under this one great big sky?
Right here and right now, we’re all sharing space.
No matter the skills, or gender or race.
It belongs to us all, not some, not a few.
We all really matter. Me, him, her and you.
When you look at another don’t find fault and take part
In judging, critiquing. Focus more on their heart.
See they are trying to live and get by
Hoping and dreaming, under our one great big sky.
Make room in your space for those who don’t share
Your approach to this life and about what you care.
Imagine if you will – you can if you choose –
A world where all matter, not one where some lose.
What has to change in you and in me
To live in a world where we all get to be
Just who we are, with no need to be shy
Living together, under our one great big sky?
If you see someone living with treatment unjust,
One who is struggling – pay attention – we must.
Tune in to notice what’s really there.
Reach out, go help, and be ready to care.
We each get to be here, to work hard and try
No matter our race, whether a girl or a guy.
No matter our work, if we build, write or fly;
To be our best selves, under our one great big sky.
So, look just above at this space big and wide.
It’s there for us ALL; it’s there to provide.
We each get this space, this time and this life.
Respect it and share it, don’t bring on the strife.
Show up on purpose! Be here! Don’t be shy!
Let’s all make some room, under our one great big sky.
This article was written by Jay Forte
Click HERE to Learn more about Jay’s work.
WEBSITE: https://thefortefactor.com/
