fitforjoy

I PROMISE MYSELF

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I Promise Myself…

  1. to laugh as if nobody’s watching, and love as if I’ve never been hurt before.

  2. to live as if I were to die tomorrow, and learn as if I were to live forever.

  3. to let go of the heavy burden of my past. To turn my wounds into wisdom and my

    difficulties into opportunities.

  4. to love myself as much as I would like others to love me.

  5. to die to the past every night, so that I can be born again each morning.

  6. to never speak from a place of hate, jealousy, anger, or insecurity. And to always evaluate

    my words before I let them leave my lips.

  7. to forgive so that I can heal, and let go so that I can grow.

  8. to learn from every experience and every interaction life sends my way.

  9. to always look for the good in people. To treat everyone with love, kindness, compassion,

    appreciation and never speak badly of anyone.

  10. to allow life’s many challenges to make me better, not bitter.

  11. to complain less, and live my life with an attitude of gratitude.

  12. to create a sense of purpose and bring meaning into everyday life. No matter how many

    times I fall or fail, I promise myself to never give up on myself or my dreams.

  13. to let go of all the drama in my life, and only hold on to those things that bring me joy.

  14. to live my life in a way that inspires others and strive to bring out the best in them.

  15. to surround myself with people who make me hungry for life, touch my heart, and nurture

    my spirit.

  16. to think less and feel more. To judge less and trust more. To fear less and love more.

  17. to walk away from everything that no longer serves me, grows me, or makes me happy.

  18. to spend more time connecting with my authentic self, and less time chasing the love and

    approval of those around me.

  19. to show the world who I truly am and not consider what people might be thinking about me.

  20. to transform my inner vision until I see nothing but light, my own and all those around me.

  21. to let go of any bad habits I might be holding on to, and walk away from all those things

    that hold me back in life.

  22. to let go of all blame and take full responsibility for my own life.

  23. to allow the world know me as I am, not as it thinks I should be.

  24. to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving,

    and empathetic of the weak.

  25. to clothe myself with love and wear this love wherever I go.

  26. to care more about being kind than I do about being right all the time.

  27. to give more of my time to those who are special in my life, and show them how much they

    really mean to me.

  28. to trust my inner voice and intuition more than I trust the loud voice of those around me.

  29. to expect less from others but more and more from myself.

  30. to allow those I care for to be perfectly themselves without trying to twist them to fit my

    own image. Loving them for who they are and not for what I want them to be.

This article was written by John Shearer

Click HERE to Learn more about John’s work.

WEBSITE: http://mindfullymad.org/

5 TIPS FOR BUILDING HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS

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Our personal relationships are an essential part of life. We are naturally wired to connect and collaborate with others.

 

Healthy relationships contain core essential elements including respect, appreciation, and freedom. In balanced relationships, each person contributes thoughts and feelings while remaining responsible for his or her own behavior.

 

Healthy relationships are equitable; both people contribute equally — or at least balance out in the long run. Lack of balance in a relationship can show up as criticism, control, or neglect. Unhealthy relationships not only erode the mind and body, they create barriers and slow our spiritual growth.

 

In order for our relationships to remain healthy, here are five considerations:

 

Communication is consistent. Without clear communication, relationships wither. We are all unique individuals, and our perceptions, assumptions, and conclusions are also unique. Having differing opinions can be a good thing! Too much of the same routine can result in complacency and boredom. And communication isn’t just speaking; effective listening skills are imperative. Sometimes we learn the most about ourselves from each other.

 

Respect isn’t optional; it’s necessary. Unhealthy relationships are often a result of losing respect for one another. Respect comes from appreciating differences, considering perspectives, and honoring preferences. Once you lose respect for someone, the relationship starts to unravel. Over time, respect — like trust — can be earned by actions and words. Even if a relationship has become stagnant or distant, respect can still endure.

 

Healthy boundaries are clear. Creating healthy personal boundaries facilitates self-reliance and helps to develop nurturing, loving, and mature relationships. Having clear boundaries requires that we focus on ourselves and learn to communicate our preferences in healthy and respectful ways. Setting personal boundaries allows us to express our truth and beliefs to others with confidence and courage. Acknowledging and honoring the personal boundaries of others demonstrates respect and builds trust.

 

Growing together is as important as growing individually. We are all in a perpetual state of growth and expansion. When we grow individually, we expand our thoughts and beliefs by learning from ourselves. When we grow in relationships, we learn from each other. The contrast that our relationships bring may cause us to grow apart unless we make a commitment to recognize our differences as strengths. Growing together in relationship means being able to learn from each other, embrace differences, and choose to walk together on a common path.

 

Follow the love. Authentic love conquers all doubt, fear, shortcomings, feelings of inadequacy, and negativity. To be truly loved by someone is to be recognized and “seen” for all of the things we are — complete and whole — with all of our strengths and weaknesses; ups and downs; fabulousness and foibles. And it all begins with us. When we learn to love, accept, support, and appreciate ourselves, our relationships will always benefit.

 

This article was written by Michael Thomas Sunnarborg

Click HERE to Learn more about Michael’s work.

WEBSITE: https://michaelcreative.com/books/

Cancer?  Chemo? Consider!

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This is such a difficult topic to write about. There is much to say and words just do not seem adequate. I have lost several loved ones to cancers of various sorts. It pains me to hear more and more about this malicious and vicious "C" word that wreaks havoc upon millions of people. Whether we are the individuals contending with it or having to watch a loved one walk through this dark valley, we all are touched by it sooner or later in one way or another.

 

I've lost three aunts to three different types of cancer. My father also went through a bout of cancer as well. Thanks be to God, he has recovered. My aunts did not fare so well. They all passed away. Two of them dealt with it for several years and the third succumbed rather quickly. Each of these dear ones, with the exception of my father went through extensive chemotherapy, radiation and conventional drugs. I began to wonder about this. He is the only one who did not undergo these "egregious" forms of therapy. And he is the only one still here with me. I have also watched as many friends and co-workers have undergone the same conventional treatments - all to no avail.

 

I am sick and tired of the loss column growing at insidious rates while the win column shrinks. What is the common denominator in the 'loss' column? Much to my amazement, it is the receiving of the aforementioned conventional treatments. Yes, dear reader - a grim reality, is it not? This may be difficult to come to terms with; especially because the FDA sanctions these "therapies".

 

Regardless of the grim statistics, most physicians (albeit many well-meaning) continue to prescribe these conventional treatments along with conventional drug therapies such as Tamoxifen given to women with breast cancer.  However, more and more women are opting not to take this medication. “The list of side effects (some of them life-threatening) associated with taking Tamoxifen is lengthy. True, not everyone suffers from side effects, but we are discovering that some women don’t metabolize the drug very well.  For those who have tried the drug and do suffer from side effects, these can be so life-altering and impactful to their quality of life they feel they are losing their minds.” (1)

 

If the side effects are not awful enough, then there are the lies women are told about taking Tamoxifen.  Many physicians tell their patients that if they take Tamoxifen for a period of 5 years after their treatments it will give them as much as a 50% chance of living disease free. (This percentage varies amongst doctors and which studies they rely upon) (2) The horrible reality is that studies actually show this drug to be a catalyst for even more aggressive types of cancers such as liver and uterine cancer when taken for a prolonged period of time.(Researchers discovered in 1992 that Tamoxifen is a liver carcinogen in rats which led to the state of California proclaiming it to be a known carcinogen under legislation formerly known as Prop 65) It has also been linked to fatal blood clots and also interferes with many other functions in the body.(3)

 

And now, dear reader, here is the good news.  Cancer is not a death sentence! There IS hope! Unbeknownst to millions of people, there are other amazing, wonderful life saving/giving treatments - alternative treatments - that have incredible success rates. The saddest, most heinous fact is that these alternative treatments are not to be found very easily within the United States because they are not 'legal'. So I would urge you to do your own research.  

 

In my humble opinion, the perfect place for you to begin would be the very place that my journey to these amazing truths and HOPE began in 2015. This is when I found Ty and Charlene Bollinger. (The accredited information in this article is taken from their website.) In 2015 Ty and Charlene put together a 9 part documentary series called "The Truth about Cancer - A Global Quest". This incredibly brave couple opened up an entirely new world for me regarding cancer and its treatments. Just last month they did another 7 part series entitled "Eastern Medicine: Journey Through Asia". And then consider this . . . you can fight cancer right from your own kitchen! I would recommend a fabulous book called Cancer-Free with Food by Liana Werner-Gray. This is a step by step plan to fight disease, nourish the body and restore health. It includes 100+ recipes.

 

You won’t have to dig too deep to discover mind-boggling truths that will make you angry – righteously and justifiably so; especially if you or a loved one has suffered with cancer. Conventional wisdom has failed us for years. Isn't it about time we find out why?

 

Be encouraged! Cancer is not a death sentence! There is hope!

This article was written by Barbie White

Click HERE to Learn more about her work.

WEBSITE: https://737flygirl.wixsite.com/wellnesskitchen

MINDING THE MIND: WAIT, ASK AND TRUST YOUR INSTINCT

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I discovered these words, torn and discarded from my 8 year old granddaughter’s notebook, in our trash bin after one of our son’s visits. My husband had lost his hearing aid. Were it not for his absent-minded toss and my fear of the financial consequence, I would certainly never have crawled headfirst into our stinky trash bin. The wisdom of my granddaughter’s lyrics, so innocently and faithfully written, might have been lost but for grandpa’s misplaced hearing aid. The irony is not lost on me. These words would have been forever silent, lost among the ruins of banana peels and broken boxes. Such is the perfection of life.

Don’t we all know, at some level, the wisdom and truth of my granddaughter’s words? A child can only know that one thing: you and me came true into the world. As children, we have no choice but to trust that instinct, ignorant of the world and armed only with innocence. The crux of the matter is that we must survive and so begins the surrender of that True Self. We watch, we adjust, we give ourselves over to a mentally fabricated “pretend-self” to persevere. As adults, it takes awareness and years to erase that kind of conditioning.

“Minding the Mind” is the art of remembering our basic intuitive wisdom. It takes time to hear the deep inner astute voice that recognizes and embraces the Self we are meant to be. It takes time to de-condition the mind. It takes time to trust again.

Mental chatter is not the same thing as the brain processing information. Without the brain, our bodies would be lifeless. Without the mind, however, our lives would be fulfilling and purposeful. Perhaps baffling on the surface, the profundity of ignoring the mind is life changing. After six years of practicing this I am far closer to being myself than at any time in my 65 years on this planet. Finally comfortable in my own skin, my life is better. My family better for my continuing effort.

What I have discovered is that the mind does not know, it only harvests information. It can help me drive a car and remember how to turn on the coffee pot. It can help me spell and write stories that have meaning to me. It remembers (sometimes) where I put my keys and how to get to the store. But when it comes to decision making it is truly inept, a light switch on a fake wall, disconnected from its power source. My mind has gotten me into more predicaments, more trouble, than I care to remember but am inclined not to forget.

Our mental construct teachers us to hate, to fear, to object to anything that does not align with our false image of “right” or “wrong.” We build walls, real or imagined, and align with false narratives that keep us acceptable. We stay in relationships that abuse us, believe people who lie, and/or surrender our authority of “inner knowing” to another. In the most heinous of extremes, we vilify and tell lies about others who are descent, fly airplanes into buildings, or use automatic weapons to destroy life. All based upon mental decisions that choke the life out of humanity.

But there is hope. There is a way. There is a map. It begins with practicing one simple exercise that can change a person’s life forever. The secret?

WAIT.

Wait. Ask. Instinct. Trust.

Wait before making any decision or before taking an action. The world will not end if you take time to clearly know or sense whether something is true for you or not.

Ask a simple question, Is it true?  Ninety-nine percent of mental chatter is false and sells lies and conspiracy theories, most often attached in some way to religious, political or social dogma.

Instinct. Trust yours.  People who trust themselves are calm, confident, and assured. They make an impact. We cannot be like everyone else because we are not like anyone on the planet. We are magnificent in our own right and are enough. We are more than enough. We are Divinely created and perfectly Designed. Life knows where we live.

Trust that. Trust that your gifts will be discovered once you know what those gifts are. Your contributions are worthy when created from your uniqueness and will always find a home in those who are ready to receive them.

There are a lot of minds asking us to be like them.

There is no one like you.

I invite you to be you, wholly and completely, beautifully and correctly you. Within the cocoon the butterfly longs to take flight.

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This article was written by Candace Conrad and inspired by Isabella Conradi and Reese Jessner.

Click HERE to Learn more about Candace’s work.

WEBSITES: https://www.lydlifemap.com/

https://www.candaceconradi.com/

HEALING, GROWTH AND RECOVERY

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HGR emerges from hope:  The belief that recovery and joy is real provides the essential and motivating message of a better future - that people can and do overcome the internal and external challenges, barriers, and obstacles that confront them.

HGR is person- centered/driven:  Self-determination and self-concepts are the foundations for HGR individuals as they define their own life goals and design their unique path(s). 

HGR occurs via many pathways:  Individuals are unique with distinct needs, strengths, preferences, goals, culture, and backgrounds - including trauma experiences - that affects and can determine the pathway(s) to/in the Process of HGR.

HGR is holistic: HGR encompasses an individual's whole life, including mind, body, spirit, and community. The array of services and supports available should be integrated and coordinated.

HGR is supported by peers and allies: Mutual support and mutual aid from people, small groups that the person builds. Including the sharing of experiential knowledge and skills, as well as social learning, play an invaluable role in HGR and in the outcomes.

HGR is supported through relationship and social networks:  An important factor in the recovery process is the presence and involvement of people who believe in the person's ability to recover; who offer hope, support, and encouragement; and who also suggest strategies and resources for change.  

HGR is culturally-based and influenced: Culture and cultural background in all diverse representations - including values, traditions, faith and beliefs. These are keys in determining a person's journey and unique pathway in HGR.  

HGR is supported by addressing traumas: Services and supports should be trauma-informed to foster safety (physical, emotional, mental and spiritually) and trust in the self and others. This helpful to promote choice, empowerment, and collaboration to heal, grow and Recover.   '

HGR involves individual, family, and community strengths and responsibility:  Individuals, families, and communities have strengths and resources that serve as a foundation for recovery.  

HGR is based on respect: Community, systems, societal acceptance and appreciation for people are crucial in achieving in the process and living a life with Joy.

This article was written by Rev. Marc Baisden, MACP, MIN

Click HERE to Learn more about Marc Baisden

https://www.alignable.com/anchorage-ak/recovery-intervention-services

DRIVEN BY FEAR OR DRIVEN BY “LOVE”?

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Only when we are willing to truly explore these questions as a person, are we able to explore ourselves as beings.

  

It was during an episode of depression that I became aware of some major choices I had made in my life that were driven by fear.

 

I was infusing life into what I believe is lifeless: fear.

 

It makes sense to me that any thought or action that is driven by judgment and hate, for ourselves and for “others,” creates separation, and this separation isolates us from our true selves, which in turn keeps us from understanding what is real and what is not.

 

Perhaps, a life of “true” health and joy is paved by becoming aware of which thoughts and actions are driven by fear and which are driven by “Love.” And every inch of that pavement is infused with self-inquiry.

 

This practice might entail discernment combined with intuition, patience, and kindness. What a rich adventure life is within us! Self-discovery and self-exploration are so exciting to me, even if there is nowhere to go, and what is discovered can never be explained or fully understood.

 

However, what I ponder these days is whether it is true that we act and behave according to our fears or according to “Love”—at conscious or unconscious levels.

 

Is fear the opposite of “Love”?

 

If yes, then the place to stand is in between them.

 

As far as I can see, by trying to run from fear or trying to become “Love,” we can never “stand” anywhere. Our human experience is destined to be unstable—out of balance at all levels, mentally and physically—as long as we choose sides to “stand” on/by.

 

The magical antidote to unnecessary suffering might be the realization that it is not running from or becoming something that gets us “there,” but rather being “there” now, between the opposites.

 

I think this is called the non-dual state of mind. I am not sure how long, and how much of, our lives can be experienced in this state. Not through experience perhaps, as everything we experience has a dual nature attached to it, but through awareness—the subtle knowing, which cannot be known by consciousness.

 

It might be that subtle knowledge, at this very moment, simply is—and it’s all we have.

 

The past and the future are just memories. They can teach and motivate, but they are not real life. They are, perhaps, “necessary” illusions that serve as a guide depending on each person’s level of awareness.

 

It is in “being” here and now before becoming what our past or our future makes us to be that we meet life itself.

 

And so, it is by meeting life itself that we know “Love.”

 

 

I remember the beginning of my “raw” understanding of fear and “Love,” when I became open to new experiences that would expose my fears and help me to overcome them.

 

I began saying “yes” to thoughts that suggested and welcomed the new, the unknown to me.

 

And so, I said yes to everything that seemed to invite me to explore my hidden fears.

 

Boy, did this lead me to dangerous situations, one of which was when I quickly made the decision to spend a few months at a meditation retreat center in the “middle-of-nowhere” in France, where I was drugged.

 

From this experience, I became aware of which fears were not worth overcoming: The fear of living with strangers in a foreign country whose mission was to teach “others” to become “fearless.”

 

It is by replacing fear with “Love” awareness as a practice first, that we become fearless.

 

Those who are fearless are free to “Love” because “Love” is who we are: FREE. Free from the negative meaning given to our human experience.

 

The human experience includes everything that is possible to experience. The personal meaning we give to these experiences can be altered. The non-personal meaning for the human experience arises from awareness itself.

*** From Valeria’s new book: From Fear to “Love.”  

THE POWER OF RELATIONSHIPS

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The best way to practice “Loving” ourselves is through observance of our relationships with “others.”

 

Relationships might be the most precious and powerful avenue for the practice of locating where illusory fears hide.

 

The deeper and truer our relationships are, the deeper and truer we will become.

 

Relationships work as mirrors. They reflect the way we think about ourselves and/or serve as catalysts for great changes when we enter into a relationship where the other person represents the opposite of what we believe and value.

 

When we are in a state of self-inquiry, relationships can show us where our hidden fears are as well as the illusions of our beliefs about ourselves, “others,” and life.

  

Here are some practices that have removed some of my obstacles to “Love” and have revealed to me the beauty of “being it”:

 

-      NOT LYING to anyone around me and telling my “truths” in a creative and kind way so “others” would listen.

 

-      JUDGING LESS and understanding more. When people’s behavior hurts me, I ask: “Who is there to be hurt?” “Love” isn’t a person who reacts with anger, self-pity, or blame. “Love” simply is.

I then engage in the opposite practice that comes from compassion. I call it compassionate curiosity, which asks questions about the “other”: “How did they become hurt? Did I hurt them?”

 

-      TAKING PEOPLE’S ACTIONS AND BEHAVIORS LESS PERSONALLY. This is a wonderful practice. It requires us getting out of our own heads and daring to explore “others.” This can make you a better “person” if coming from a “person’s” perspective is where you are.

 

 

The “Love” that I am exploring is the one without self-interest, without a conscious cause.

 

I am here and now and this is it. “Love” it or fear it.

*** From Valeria’s new book: From Fear to “Love.”  

WHAT IS FEAR AND WHAT IS “LOVE”?

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The word “Love” is in quotations throughout this work because the kind of love I speak of has no opposites. It is every-thing and it is no-thing at the same time.

 

“Love” is what stands between dark and light, bad and good, life and death. It is also what is beyond dark and light, bad and good, life and death. “Love” is always here and now. It cannot be found somewhere in the future or somewhere outside of you; “Love” is not a destination nor a time-bound realization.

 

Intellectually, it is easier to understand and describe fear because it is the realm of mind and body, whereas “Love” is the heart’s domain.

 

Know your heart and you will know “Love.”

 

I’ve always wanted to understand the connection between fear and “Love.” They have been part of my life, or so I thought, just as everyone thinks they have experienced them. Yet, exploring the dynamics of the kinds of love I had experienced, I discovered that fear had been very much connected to it.

 

My basic understanding through experiences that were under-examined was that “Love” was good and “fear” was bad.

 

It was easier to be good and to say, “I love you,” when I was afraid of being bad or not being accepted.

 

I wished to live in a state of “Love,” but I was unaware that my way of loving was another way of being afraid.

 

This kind of love couldn’t be real. This kind of love was fear in disguise.

 

Not surprisingly, this also happened the other way around – people around me were doing the same thing.

 

It was a dance to the music of fear playing in our own heads.

 

I now have a much better idea of what love is and where my fears hide.

 

My concepts for love, fear, and hate are:

 

-      “LOVE” is all there is—as in, what our bodies, minds, and “souls” long for or wish to return to. Love is the force that brings us back to Being.

 

-      FEAR is the absence of “Love” awareness—the illusion that drives deluded/unhealthy actions and petrified states. When “Love” awareness is present, there is understanding and compassion for the body and its survival mechanism.

 

-      HATE, as well as all other forms of negative responses, is the presence of fear.

 

 

All concepts created by the mind for what you, me, love, fear, and life itself are, are exactly that: concepts. But these concepts matter for a human experience that manifests health, joy, peace, and—yes—lots of love!

 

I have not yet met anyone who has conceptualized love in a non-loving way.

 

My concepts for awareness, true self, and consciousness are:

 

 

-      AWARENESS sees all things simply as they are. No opposites. No distinctions. No judgment. Awareness is a presence that can’t be described. We can be aware that we are conscious, but not conscious that we are aware.

 

-      THE TRUE SELF, (also called the soul, the spirit, or the higher self) can distinguish thoughts, behaviors, and actions driven by “Love” and those driven by fear.

 

-      CONSCIOUSNESS is that which chooses to act upon thoughts driven by “Love” rather than by fear. This is interesting.

Why are some of us able to make these choices, or make choosing to act upon “Love” a practice? Is it connected to our psychological patterns derived from past experiences? How “past” are these past experiences? Are they passed on to us from our ancestors, our current lifetime experiences, or past lives?

My desire to understand “Love” and fear is connected to the experience of “becoming aware,” which keeps bringing me back to this present moment. The more I rest in the now, the more I learn to accept and be grateful, and the more JOY I discover within myself.

 

Awareness, true self, and consciousness are just sophisticated ideas/concepts available to be used by the mind in an attempt to understand itself. When all concepts disappear, what remains is Being—the experience of experiencing.

 

 

Most of us can find joy in this very moment through important concepts such as acceptance and gratitude. This shows how relevant concepts and ideas are and how they can be used as methods for understanding who we are.

 

If together we can understand “Love” and fear the same way, the experience of “being” could easily turn into spiritual fun!

 

Becoming “Love” aware collectively translates into acceptance and gratitude for one another and, as a consequence, our joy multiplies.

 

If I am entertaining the mind’s powerful ability to create, I see no harm in giving wings to the idea of becoming “Love” aware and doing so with “others.”

 

This idea matters as far as our current human condition is concerned.

 

The experience of becoming “Love” aware together, and the shared joy created from it, is a gift to our well-being, to our workplace, our communities, cities, countries, and the whole world.

 

The more “Love” awareness is actualized, the more joy becomes the currency of life.

*** From Valeria’s new book: From Fear to “Love.”  

LIBERATED JOY THAT DOESN’T EXCLUDE ANYTHING

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The primary inspiration for writing the Fit for Joy book was the realization that—here and now—I was exactly where I was supposed to be in every way.

 

I realized that I was in perfect alignment with joy and always had been.

 

In other words, I understood that “Love” is our natural state of being and feeling “joy” is our natural state of living.

 

So, what had been holding me back from experiencing ‘liberated joy’ for almost forty years?

 

Fear and, more precisely, the fear attached to the story of my life - that was my guess back then, but I couldn’t understand it. Today, I know how “real” fear can seem to be when there is no understanding of “Love.”

 

Becoming “Love” aware (fearless to Love) is a complex wisdom concept that, when experienced, is the simplest thing you will ever come across because this wisdom (detached from concepts) has always been within you.

 

The mind can become anything: A field of thoughts driven by all kinds of fear, or a wonderful servant to “Love” awareness expressing life in so many unique ways.

 

 

We become who we THINK we are.

We ARE that, before thinking, before becoming.

 

 

With the influence of thoughts, we create “people” who are separated from “Love.”

 

To return to “Love” is to experience self-care, practice self-inquiry, and delve deeper into our relationships.

 

My wish is to continue exploring—along with “others”— this infinite complexity, simplicity, beauty, and mystery of life and “Love” within and through this body.

 

Joy is inseparable from the observance of the content of our conditioned mind and bodies. The mystery of it all is manifested into unconditional smiles.

*** From Valeria’s new book: From Fear to “Love.”  

“LOVE” AWARENESS



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 The book From Fear to “Love” is comprised of thoughts on self-care, non-duality, self-inquiry, and relational awareness. It brings to light how self-knowledge ignites the process of defining what “Love” is in our lives.

 

Fear holds us back from experiencing “Love” and joy.

 

We act and think a certain way, apprehensive of how “others” might view us or concerned that we won’t measure up to their expectations.

 

In truth, our way of loving is another way of being afraid.

 

We love so “others” won’t think we are bad. This way, no one will know what we really think or who we “think” we are.

 

Our way of loving, informed by our fear, ends up shaping us into something that is everything except “real, loving” people.

 

This brings us to a question: What would it look like to have no fear—to be fearless to “Love”?

 

It’s through becoming “Love” aware in the NOW that you can experience this fearlessness.

 

Love yourself so that you are free to “Love” “others.”

 

Imagine what the world would look like if each person “loved themselves” and “others.” Life would be much more fun and relaxed for “everyone”!

 

Being “Love” aware, while in the moment, brings well-being to the ever-present now.

 

Relationships are the most powerful way to experience “Love.”

 

“Love” simply is.

 

The more “Love” awareness we have, the more we can heal our own pain and suffering, and thus be in a position to assist in healing “others.”

 

By freeing yourself from negative responses and enjoying “just being,” your brain can change your mind, and your mind can change your brain.

 

What happens when you enjoy “just being”?

 

You are free, you are joyful, you are “Loving.”

 

Acting upon the virtues of “Love” is a moment-to-moment practice.

 

You won’t get it right every time; but there is no need to worry. When you make a mistake, you will experience compassion for yourself.

 

Become “Love” aware.

 

Every experience is a gift.

 

It takes courage to change.

 

The person you think you are expects everything to remain the same. “Love” expects you to return to it.

 

No one can tell you how to feel. You are your own leader, in charge of your emotions.

 

Return to “Love” and you will see the illusion of fear, of hate, of insecurities, of worthlessness, of anxiety, and all other similar emotions that serve as obstacles or catalysts to you recognizing who you really are.

 

Create your own opportunities for change by taking good care of yourself, practicing gratitude, self-inquiry, and acceptance.

 

Be All That You Are: “Love.”


 

*** From Valeria’s new book: From Fear to “Love.”  


Note: The words others, everyone, and themselves are in quotations because during deeper spiritual experiences, I felt an infinite connection to everything and to everyone. This is to say that energetically, there wasn’t any separation between me and the other.

A NOTE ON “LOVE”



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  The Love I speak of is all there is—that is, what our bodies, minds, and “souls” long for or wish to return to.

 

The Love I speak of is the force that drives us to act in a selfless way when connecting with “others,” or to remain still when chaos is around us.

 

It’s the force that drives birds to fly and trees to be silent.

 

The Love I speak of is the “no-thing” from which “every-thing” arises.

 

The message in this book is about “Love” awareness.

 

“Love” awareness cannot be pointed out within you because it is simultaneously every part of you and yet none of you. Awareness knows that you are conscious, but consciousness doesn’t know that you are aware.

 

It’s like waking up in the middle of a dream. It’s knowing that you are dreaming, yet being awake.  You still have to play by the rules of the dream, which are created by the different levels of your consciousness.

 

Even if you are able to keep yourself “awakened” in the dream, the dream still feels very “real” to you on some level. And so, there will be room for fear that comes from any kind of perceived danger that threatens what is “real” to you. When awakened in the dream, any other kind of fear is confusion derived from the absence of "Love" awareness; the understanding of who we are. You’ve forgotten that you are dreaming.

 

Life is the unimaginable experience of being, in which we find delight through the acceptance of its mystery.

 

We are in a body, using its built-in tools of navigation to explore the objective reality that matches itself. We also have a mind projecting layers upon layers of subjective realities to match its ability to create and to become.

 

Those who are ”Love” aware understand the nature of the body as well as the nature of the mind.

 

My spiritual experiences and explorations have confirmed that life is what is happening now.

 

By practicing "Love" awareness, I find that the mind is constantly trying to take "me" somewhere beyond this moment. "I" keep bringing it back to where the body is. This simple practice affirms a fundamental truth: The body is the most "real" illusion created by the mind.

 

Your main practice is to be aware of where the mind is trying to take you. There is no place to go, no destination to arrive at, no enlightenment to achieve. You are "Love" awareness. You are "it"—nature in its ultimate creative perfection.

 

Being "Love" aware includes embracing the experience of life at all levels. There is a deep presence in the form of feelings such as acceptance, appreciation, and awe derived from “Love” awareness and its clarity.

 

Your mind still tries to create a better dream; better-conditioned realities. When you are "Love” aware, your actions (your dreams) are much more refined, relaxed, and enjoyable. There is a sense that you are in charge of your dreams, although you are not. Actions are still conditioned to our conscious and subconscious states, but they have been elevated to match our spiritual understanding. The deeper this understanding is, the more joy we derive from the smallest and simplest things in life, and the more peaceful we are during difficult situations.

 

“Love” awareness is not a philosophy, a method, or a path. It’s a knowing untouched by the body and the mind. However, through body and mind, we can use philosophies, methods, and paths to understand "Love.” Once it is understood, there is no need for philosophies, methods, and/or paths.

 

We are liberated!



*** From the book: From Fear to “Love” by Valeria Teles

SOUL AWAKEN — SENSUALITY — SELF-DISCOVERY

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 Life sometimes shifts when we least expect it to. Do you ever feel like you are dancing to repeating rhythms and melodies, songs that haunt you and at times retreat into the dark? And then suddenly, without fuss you find yourself at that wondrous crossroads of wisdom and desire where spirit speaks to you.

A place so sensuous and seductive that you have no choice but to let your soul awaken and dance to a different beat?

Perhaps this is the gift of spring, the rebirth of our mojo, our “muchness” as the Mad Hatter said to Alice. As the days grow longer and the cold retreats we explore a world full of options and opportunities. We shake off the illusions and scars that never defined us and make choices based on desire and wisdom, an unbeatable combination. Winter warns us that the world is dangerous and cold, but spring invites us to dive into our desires with passion and laughter and a bit of grace.

Maybe it is the wind that blows through our now open windows, or the scent of wild flowers that distract us from our fears. All we know is that life is calling and we must answer.

The crossroads is a meeting place where the voice of the universe speaks to us, reminding us that we will never really lose our craving for life and the touch of wildness on our hearts. Wisdom and desire are intertwined, and promise to be our guides. This is where I have found myself, dancing at the crossroads with just enough fear to know that an adventure awaits.

Perhaps it is the trip I am planning, or perhaps it is love just beyond the bend in the path.

Or best of all, perhaps I am about to meet my own powerful self, a part of me I was afraid had frozen in the past. If I am truly lucky, it will be all of these and more.

Do you feel the adventure of life calling to you? It does not take much to respond. Open the door and put your feet on a trail or a beach, or perhaps a dance floor. Spread your arms and twirl in the sunshine, letting your hair tangle and swirl.

Stop guarding your heart and start embracing love.

Everything you desire is here, because you are standing where desire and wisdom, love and passion, clarity and sensuality meet.

This article was written by Elisa Robyn

Click HERE to Learn more about her work.

https://elisarobyn.com/

TRYING TOO HARD

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I now see that my "fit and healthy" lifestyle was made up of a series of these kinds of experiences. I was very disciplined, but this discipline was turning me into the opposite of a loving and happy person. I came to realize that the pursuit of a fit and healthy body could only be a positive thing if we’ve already recognized our spiritual hearts as perfectly fit to provide us with a life of happiness and peace. In other words, although a fit body can improve our health, earn compliments that boost our self-esteem, and give us a temporary “high” of accomplishment, without a content mind and joyful heart, our happiness won’t last long. When our health and feel-good states depend on external conditions and constant hard work, this can propel us into an endless, destructive cycle.

Much love!

Valeria

ON SELF-LOVE

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SELF-LOVE

After many insights and lessons, I’ve learned to have self-love without selfishness; to recognize which behaviors are motivated by love rather than fear; to see how closely connected my past is to my present; and that love, joy, and peace are at the core of our true nature with regard to how we relate to others and the world. My new spiritual understanding not only gave deeper meaning to my life, but it has also caused external changes I could never have imagined. 

 

Much love!

Valeria

HER SADNESS WAS MY SADNESS

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I met my first client of the day at seven in the morning.

Angela was a thirty-five-year-old married woman living in Manhattan. I reached her building thirty minutes early, and waited for her for another ten. When she arrived in the lobby to greet me, I remember wondering why she’d hired me. She was petite, young, and in great shape.

We walked to the gym, which was empty. She turned on the air conditioning and the lights. Our session began and we went through the initial protocol, a dynamic warm-up.

She looked down the entire time. I asked her unimportant questions to break the silence, but her answers were brief, accompanied by a shy smile. I felt my presence was enough for her. Throughout the workout, Angela only spoke a few words, moved in a slow, controlled way, and never looked straight at me. I felt like I was at a funeral and I didn’t know who the dead person was. I felt awkward, trying to cheer her up or at least alleviate the silence. I pretended I was participating in a comfortable and normal situation between two people.

When the workout ended, we planned our weekly schedule and said goodbye to each other under the same gloomy cloud. This was a client whom the best exercise and diet in the world would never help to feel joyful. It was never about fitness for Angela. She was looking for a friend.

I left her building feeling very down. I couldn’t pretend to be her warm friend while also being a trainer. Her sadness was my sadness.

There was no time to be unhappy, though. My next client was James, and he needed me downtown at ten. I crossed the street and entered the subway station.  

 

Much Love!

Valeria Teles