THE MENTAL RESISTANCE TO WHAT ARISES AND THE TRUST TO LET THEM BE
Here is an inspiring and insightful book that has touched my inner and outer world: “The Rogue Scorpion” by Lynda Faye Schmidt
— Thoughts of the previous evening bubble up in her head. She smiles, remembering how happy Catalina looked when she shared Kamila’s apology with her on the way to church, how being at peace with her sister, finally, felt like the most beautiful gift of all. Isabella forces herself to resist the temptation to think and relaxes into stillness. Less than a minute later, a line from A New Earth comes to her mind: “The greatest difficulty is the mental resistance to things that arise, and the underlying assumption that they should not.”
She sits with this wisdom and smiles again. She wonders, without self-judgment, only curiosity, if she will ever be able to feel at peace with all things. She thinks about how impossible it felt to accept other people’s ideas and judgments about her and Catalina, and how she struggled to be okay with it, despite knowing that other people’s stories are not her concern. Her smile broadens. With a tear of joy in her eye, she accepts herself as she is, with all her imperfections, knowing she has time to learn, and that she’s only getting started on her path. She tiptoes into her bedroom and quietly retrieves her sketchbook journal, then plunks down on the couch to draw.
Isabella feels like her pencil is being moved by divine intervention. She watches as though a bystander as the blank page transforms into a scene that depicts herself embodied as a sunflower. Her arms are branches that reach for the sun in the sky above. Her feet are roots, supported by the solid, moist earth.
— Dearest God, Creator of all things, it’s me, Isabella. I come to you in prayer, seeking your guidance, needing your loving strength more than I ever have before. I don’t know how to do this. I want to trust the process of life, and yet, I don’t know how to let my father go. I’m not ready. My father is the mirror in which the reflection of myself is the closest to perfection. He sees me with total unconditional love and acceptance. His love has been the rock of my foundation, and I’m afraid without it, I will crumble. Where will I turn to without his fatherly presence to comfort and guide me?
Even as I think these words, with you as my witness, I know the answer. I know that you are my father and my mother too. With your spirit in my heart, I’m never alone. You are with me, for eternity. You are with him too, and he will always be with me in spirit. It doesn’t mean it won’t be hard. It will likely be the hardest thing I’ve yet had to endure. But I know I can do this. I’ve got everything I need, including my beautiful Catalina. The people who love me will help me. We’ll all support one another. I made a promise to my father, and I plan on keeping it.
Thank you, dearest God, for giving me this awareness. For filling my earthly vessel with the strength, courage, and wisdom to live my life in faith. I don’t have all the answers. I don’t know what lies ahead for my father, or for me. But I trust that life will unfold according to your divine plan, with a purposeful design, beyond my comprehension.
Amen.
5 THINGS THAT COULD BE AFFECTING YOUR HEARING
With today's busy schedules, many people struggle to keep up with their health needs. From annual checkups with your primary doctor to having your hearing tested, many fall behind in the things that really matter to their overall health.
Along with natural aging, there are many reasons why your hearing may be impaired. If it has been a gradual decline, it can often be a problem that goes unnoticed until it becomes a hassle. Asking people to repeat themselves and straining to hear are two of the most common signs of hearing impairment.
Hearing problems don’t always have to be permanent or require a hearing aid. In some cases, it may be allergies that make you lose hearing in one or both of your ears. Let’s take a closer look at a few of the things that could affect your ability to hear correctly.
Convertibles
The summer is a great time to take your convertible for a ride down country or city roads. While a trip like this might seem lovely, it has some hearing risks. The sound levels that drivers were exposed to in most cases were between 88 and 90 decibels. An average conversation usually occurs at 50 to 60 decibels. Exposure to 85 decibels for a prolonged period can cause hearing loss, so this riding with the top down should be enjoyed only occasionally.
Headphones
The act of listening to music through your smartphone or stereo is not harmful in itself. However, there is a risk of damage occurring due to long-term exposure to loud music. Typically, people are more likely to set their device to a louder volume setting when they use earbuds that don't block background noise. Experiencing loud music over a prolonged period of time was not meant to be healthy for our ears.
Urban Noise
The noise levels on a busy street in a big city can reach as high as 100 decibels at times. There is a high possibility that the noise level will be even higher if an ambulance passes by or a police siren starts wailing. Those who live in cities are exposed to these sounds daily and can prevent hearing loss by wearing earplugs and getting regular hearing testing to keep up to date with the problem.
Televisions
If you have to shout to be heard while the TV is on, it’s likely too loud. Hearing aids can improve your hearing, rather than having you resort to turning up the volume. This will benefit your neighbors as well as your ears.
Smoking
Smoking is unhealthy for your lungs, but it can affect your hearing as well. A good blood flow to the cochlea is essential for the proper functioning of our hearing system. As a result of smoking tobacco, blood flow is restricted. The cumulative damage caused by smoking cigarettes may not be permanent, but it can affect you over time. This is yet another reason to quit.
If you feel that your hearing is not what it used to be, the best advice is to see a doctor at ArabiaMD immediately. Before you worry about permanent hearing loss, remember that common hearing causes could be part of your problem.
5 HEALTH BENEFITS OF SPENDING TIME IN NATURE DURING ADDICTION RECOVERY
The natural environment has a pure and healing quality to it.
Just imagine you are hiking across the mountains on a cool October morning.
You are sitting on the beach, watching the waves pound the sand, or just looking up at the starry night sky.
These visuals elicit strong emotions in us.
The theory behind nature therapy for depression and drug addiction is that spending time outside can help you recover more quickly. So if you're trying to overcome a drug or alcohol addiction, nature could be the perfect remedy.
Ascendant, a popular New York rehabilitation center, states the benefits of spending time in nature during addiction recovery, which is why they have included nature therapy in their treatment approach.
Why Should You Spend Time In Nature During Addiction Recovery?
Spending time in nature to recover from drug addiction can have great benefits and help you focus on healthy living and sobriety. Once you plan some activities outside, you can identify how they help you stay sober during addiction recovery:
1: Strengthens Immune System
Nature aids in strengthening our immune systems, which might be impaired as a result of addiction.
Going outside will provide your body with Vitamin D, essential for your immunity. People who don't receive enough vitamin D are more likely to get sick, develop diabetes, develop atrophic arthritis, and develop heart disease.
A person's immune system is also vulnerable to the same risks if they spend all of their time indoors.
The body cannot create a new form of reaction without experiencing the outside world and meeting new people. As a result, spending time outside and in nature will significantly aid in the development of your immunity during your addiction recovery.
2: Improves Sleep
It is prevalent for people in recovery from addiction to lose sleep.
However, because you are burning up your energy, indulging in outdoor activities in nature that make your heart pulse faster can help with sleeplessness. As a result, you're more likely to feel tired and sleepy
A good night's sleep is also essential for keeping a healthy lifestyle.
Unfortunately, almost everyone has fallen victim to a faulty sleeping system at some point in their lives.
Spending too much time indoors, in front of artificial light from TVs and computer screens might disrupt your sleeping cycles. The simplest solution is to spend more time outside. Going outside, especially in the early morning sunshine, can help you find your natural daily rhythm.
3: Manages Anxiety And Stress
Nature assists us in coping with stress and worry. Stress is processed differently in the body when you are surrounded by nature, and it becomes more bearable.
Even the scenery outside your window can help you calm your mind because seeing green instead of a screen is always a good idea to reduce stress and manage anxiety.
Nature can help us relax and think more creatively, just as it can help us relax and think more creatively.
Take your diary outside and write poetry while relaxing in nature if you enjoy reading and writing. Another advantage of the outdoors in addiction therapy is mental serenity and new coping skills.
4: Improves Focus
Staying outside and being surrounded by vegetation will also help you concentrate.
Even looking at greenery for 40 seconds, whether in an urban or natural setting, can boost our focus, which is beneficial for addiction treatment.
You can also employ mindfulness to help you focus on the sights, sounds, and smells while also generating sentiments and excitement. Additionally, because spending time outside refreshes one's mind, it can increase one's function and problem-solving abilities.
Hence, when you are in addiction recovery, you must focus on something, and spending time in nature can help you do that.
5: Encourages Exercise
We will be more likely to exercise if we stay outside. Nature gives us the freedom to move, walk, run around, or at the very least take a stroll and enjoy the landscape.
Physical activities like exercising outside can also help you get in better shape, allowing you to feel stronger, more robust, and more confident.
We can also work out outside with individuals we enjoy.
Loneliness can result from spending time alone at home. Instead, surround yourself with people, share your thoughts and ideas, and enjoy nature while distracting your mind from your addiction. Meeting new people and mingling can sometimes provide the most beneficial healing sessions.
Nature Activity Ideas
— Outdoor journaling is one of the most popular activities to do in nature. When you come out of rehab, you must have a lot of emotions piled up inside you, and if you start writing them in your journal, you will feel a lot better
— Gardening is also one of the best activities to do outside after addiction recovery. When you dig the soil, plant the seeds, water, and take care of the plants, you release the piled-up energy in a positive manner.
—Going for a hike is also a good way to spend time in nature, and it is one of the best exercises to do outside. So instead of taking a stroll around the block, head to the forest or mountains, and when you reach the top, you will feel a lot better.
—Getting creative with your artistic nature is another good suggestion to spend your day outside. You can sit in your backyard and draw the scenery you see in front of you. You can also let mother nature inspire you to write poems or song lyrics.
—Exercising in nature is indeed a good activity to adopt post-recovery. So instead of hitting the gym, do 30 minutes of exercise in nature. It will help you breathe fresh air. You can also go for a jog in the local park because staying in touch with greenery can help you commit to sobriety better.
Go Green!
Once you find out how spending time in nature helps you grow, you can recover from addiction and commit to your sobriety better.
Even if you are not undergoing recovery, spending time in nature is always a good decision.
So, if you want more information on these, reach us in the comment box. We will get back to you with an answer in no time.
BREATH HYGIENE: KEEPING THE MIND AND BODY HEALTHY
Over the past few weeks I’ve seen numerous social media posts counseling people to stay calm and stay clean. In my experience, employing good breath hygiene is the most effective way to both remain grounded and support immune and respiratory health. The breath is our greatest inner resource and with a little breath education, you too can develop the capacity to settle yourself, even when fear is gnawing at your gut! Initially, breath hygiene may feel unfamiliar or awkward (much like learning to wipe down everything you touch with disinfectant) but the more you work with it, the easier it gets. Here are five valuable tips for how you can use the breath as a powerful BFF to enhance emotional regulation, while simultaneously giving your immune system a boost:
1) Breathe Through Your Nose: I’m going to actually write that again in all caps to implore you: PLEASE, BREATHE THROUGH YOUR NOSE. The nasal cavity is the miraculous starting point for your immune system. Your nose is designed to protect your lungs from foreign particles, including germs. Within the nasal cavity are tiny turbinates that work hard to filter out substances that are not intended to be ingested. Inside the sinus cavities you have pockets of Nitric Oxide, a potent anti-microbial gas that has been shown to have anti-viral capacities as well. With each nasal inhalation you ensure that the air you are taking into your body has passed through your natural TSA check-point, weeding out potential biological terrorists.
I suggest employing nose-breathing 24/7. For me this means taping my mouth each night before bed. Nose breathing at night supports deeper, more restful sleep. Sleep is an incredibly important factor in sustaining your health. Mouth-breathing is linked to snoring, sleep apnea, insomnia, dental decay, and poor gum-health. Mouth and chest breathing also foster anxiety and panic by stimulating the sympathetic nervous system. To employ mouth-tape at night, use hypo-allergenic paper tape, like 3M Micropore or Nexcare Paper Tape.
2) Breathe light : Although common lore says that when you feel nervous or upset that you should take a deep (implying BIG ) breath, I’m going to suggest the opposite. Here’s why:
Big breathing stimulates your sympathetic nervous system. You tend to take big sighs or gulps of air when you are stressed or physically working-out. When you are relaxed your breath is slow and soft. I routinely ask anxious clients, “How would Buddha Breathe?” Can you imagine Buddha huffing and puffing his way through meditation? If you invoke your inner-Buddha and settle the breath, you will find that the mind follows and settles in-kind. This is the key to the power behind yoga pranayama practices. When you quiet your breathing, the nervous system resets into relaxation mode. If your internal alarm system isn’t being fired off by hefty rounds of big breathing, your mind will likely cease and desist from agitating stories of impending doom.
3) Breathe slow: It’s not always easy, but the companion to a light breath is a slow, rhythmic breath.
Fast breathing correlates with a higher heart rate and the fight or flight response. It tends to give rise to shallow, chest-generated breathing. When you override the urge to breathe rapidly, you exhibit personal agency over your reactivity in the present moment. This is empowering! Regardless of the circumstances happening outside of yourself, you can choose to maintain a slow, light cadence: Inhale 4 seconds, exhale 6 seconds, pause for 2. This keeps your mind from being hi-jacked by fear while reinforcing resilience.
4) Breathe like a Jelly Fish: Imagine your diaphragm, which sits right in the center of your body expanding and contracting like a beautiful jelly-fish floating through the ocean. When you breathe in, your diaphragm flattens, expanding your rib-cage laterally. When you exhale, your diaphragm draws inward narrowing the dome into the concave space between the ribs. This action formulates the basics of functional breathing bio-mechanics.
The abdominal muscles also attach to the lower rib-cage and work synergistically with the diaphragm. You can actively engage your abdominals to amplify healthy diaphragmatic movement. To do this, span your hands around the lower side-ribs and upper belly. With each exhalation, draw the belly inward as if you were hugging your viscera and giving it a good squeeze. On inhalation, relax the belly and allow it to passively expand. Visualize the undulating movement of a jelly-fish and train your belly and diaphragm to dance with the breath, much as a jelly-fish propels itself through water. Jelly-fish breathing enhances your parasympathetic nervous system by gently pumping the vagus nerve and replacing the chest-breathing habit. It massages your heart and supports lymphatic drainage. When you jelly-fish breathe, the lower lobes of the lungs are better activated which improves ventilation and profusion with far less effort.
5) Short Breath Hold Practice - Your ER Breath Remedy: It may sound counter-intuitive, but the absolute most effective way to short-circuit the panic button is to voluntarily stop breathing.
Employing Short Breath Holds (SBH) in a repetitive fashion rebalances your oxygen and carbon-dioxide levels. This in turns, increases oxygenation to the tissues, reducing tension. The arteries dilate, airways reopen, and nervous impulses quiet down. All of these systemic responses support you feeling more in control and less likely to be emotionally de-railed.
Here’s how to employ a SBH practice:
a) Always work with the pause after exhale.
b) Take a gentle nasal breath in and out (light, slow, and low).
c) Seal your nostrils with your fingers and count gently up to 5.
d) Release your fingers and take another gentle breath in and out through the nose.
e) Take a second or third ‘recovery’ breath between breath-hold cycles as needed.
f) Repeat the short breath-hold process.
g) Gradually increase the hold to 6, 7, or 8 seconds.
h) Build gradually over several breath cycles until you feel a return to calm.
NOTE: Short breath holds are never to be done after the inhale. Only sustain the suspension of the breath to a level that feels slightly challenging, not to the point that you’re gasping for the next in-breath. Be sure that the inhalation that follows your breath-hold is nasal - through the nose. Also, feel free to adapt. If a 5 second initial hold feels too long, drop it down to 1, 2 or 3 seconds and build from there. If you feel comfortable extending the breath hold to 12 or 15 seconds, work at that level. Honor where you are with this process. As your respiratory system calms down, you’ll find it easier to volitionally suspend the breath for longer periods of time.
Why it Works: The intention of the SBH practice is to allow your CO2 levels to raise back up re-establishing homeostasis. CO2 has a sedative effect on your nervous system. It acts as a vasodilator and relaxes the smooth muscle in the body which is embedded in the airways, arteries, and organs including the brain. When you stress-breathe for a period of time, you can temporarily hyper-ventilate. This means you’re breathing too much and lowering CO2 levels below normal. The lower levels of CO2 can make you feel like you’re having a heart attack or possibly dying. SBH practice offers a safer and less-cumbersome alternative to paper-bag breathing. The paper-bag method (dramatized in movies as a response to panic attacks) is intended to restore CO2 levels, offering immediate relief.
SBH practice can also be used to stave off coughs, wheezing, or chronic congestion. I encourage my clients to sway, dance, or jog in place while practicing their breath-holds. This offers a useful and playful distraction, enabling more comfort while learning this technique. Others find accompanying SBH practice with the repetition of a silent mantra like, “Om Shanti”, or “Light, Love, Joy and Peace” to be very soothing.
To summarize, remember these salient points:
Breathe through your nose;
Breathe Light
Breathe Slow
Breathe Low (Jelly-fish breathing)
When feeling anxious, worried, or restless - reach for your innate rescue remedy: Short Breath Holds!
The brilliant thing about good breath hygiene is you can practice all day long and no wipes are required! Learning to breathe this way offers potent sustenance to embody a calm, relaxed, and responsive state of mind. May we all find our way through these turbulent times and model our commitment to health and sanity through proactive self-care like good breath hygiene.
Written by Robin Rothenberg
To learn more about Robin please visit: www.EssentialYogaTherapy.com
HOW TO BETTER MANAGE YOUR STRESS
Do you know anyone like this?
“Stress level: extreme. It's like she was a jar with the lid screwed on too tight, and inside the jar were pickles, angry pickles, and they were fermenting, and about to explode.” --Fiona Wood
It's a great visual. My brothers and I used to come home from school on hot, August afternoons when Mother was canning bread and butter pickles. They were angry pickles. The acrid odor of vinegar engulfed the entire kitchen and we'd sprint, eyes watering and throats tightening to keep from gagging, out the back door in pursuit of a breath of fresh air. The thought of being around a jar of fermented pickles ready to explode today is enough to send me running.
Imagine your stress-induced emotions as acetous pickle juice just waiting to explode from a pressure-filled jar. Maybe it's how you're feeling right now...as if you're on the brink of detonating into an eruption of anger, or find yourself jetting quickly toward an emotional melt-down. Prolonged stress can do that to the best of us. And while stress most likely won't be going away any time soon, we can learn to make choices which will help us better manage it.
The Negative Impacts of Stress
Stress is a normal part of everyday life, but if we don't learn to get a handle on it, it can wreak havoc on our mental and physical health. Based upon results of a stress study done by the American Psychological Association, 66% of people regularly experience physical symptoms of stress, and 63% experience psychological symptoms. Because our natural stress response is not designed to be continually engaged, we must find ways to shut it off. Scientists at the University of California, Berkeley, discovered that prolonged stress disrupts the balance in the brain, throwing off the normal cadence of brain cell communication. (https://psychcentral.com/blog/how-stress-affects-mental-health/) A study done by Columbia University Medical Center researchers found that negative impact of stress could be likened to smoking more than five cigarettes a day! (https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2250106/Stress-bad-heart-smoking-cigarettes-day.html).
"Learn how to cope, sweet friend. There will always be dark days."
-- Kris Carr
Your Stress Triggers
Developing awareness around your stress triggers is a good place to start. Grab a journal, ask yourself these three questions, and note your responses:
Which situations occur on a regular basis which cause you to feel stressed?
Which people in your life could you name as sources of your stress?
Which circumstances turn routine situations into stressful situations? (For example, do you feel more stressed when you haven't eaten, or when you've overeaten? How does sleep (and a lack of) affect your stress levels? When you let your worries run rampant, do you find you're feeling more stressed?, etc.).
If you can become aware of your triggers, there's a good chance that you can avoid escalations, shifting behaviors before they turn toxic.
What are you feeling?
Do you recognize what stress feels like in your body? Those who have strong stress management skills are able to detect rising stress before it reaches a dangerous level. Physically, you may experience headaches, fatigue, or shoulder pain. Other common symptoms are stomach aches, excessive sweating, back pain, and a racing heart. Behavior-wise, you may find you are taking a habit to an extreme, like overeating or excessive smoking. You may find you're short-tempered, grinding your teeth, or driving too fast. Emotionally, you may find you are bothered by unimportant issues, getting the cry-feeling more often, or feeling depressed and dejected. Cognitively, you may have trouble thinking clearly, or struggle to translate your thoughts into clear words. You may find it hard to concentrate or find yourself more forgetful than normal.
Learning to recognize how stress rears its ugly head in your body is something you want to tune into. Next time a stressful situation arises, take a moment to notice what you're feeling and write it down.
"Everyone has the ability to increase resilience to stress. It requires hard work and dedication, but over time, you can equip yourself to handle whatever life throws your way without adverse effects to your health. Training your brain to manage stress won't just affect the quality of your life, but perhaps even the length of it." --Amy Morin
Stress Reduction Techniques
Though you may not be able to make the stressful situation or person go away, you can learn how to control your own responses. Here are some techniques you can try to reduce the feeling of stress. Which of these could you undertake, in the moments when stress arises?
Practice gratitude.
Take long, deep breaths.
Exercise.
Get some extra zzzz's.
Remind yourself that this too, shall pass.
Rediscover your sense of humor and laugh.
Listen to relaxing music.
Spend some time in nature.
Meditate.
Become a realistic optimist and focus on positive outcomes of the current situation.
Have a good cry.
Forgive...yourself and others.
Eat healthy food and resist junk food/stress eating.
Do something you find to be fun.
Slow down.
Practice boundaries (learn to say no when needed)
Forgive others' poor behavior.
Refuse to let irrational ideas and thoughts swim around in your head.
Visualize yourself in a peaceful place.
Pray or other spiritual practices.
Quit procrastinating and tackle some items on your to-do list.
Call a friend who is able to put you at ease.
Fill in the blank (what works for you?)
Create an Action Plan
Now that you're aware of your triggers, understand what you're feeling, and have a few techniques to use, it's time to create a plan. Grab a journal and write about these prompts:
1-The stress symptoms I need to notice and pay attention to are:
2-My current stress triggers, including both situations, people, and circumstances, are:
3-How do I currently deal with these stressors?
4-What's a better way I could respond to these stressors?
5-What is one technique I can incorporate to remind myself to engage in stress management, as I begin to recognize my symptoms?
6-When do I anticipate the next stressful situation to happen?
7-What will I do when it occurs?
If you're struggling with creating an action plan, consider teaming up with a social + emotional intelligence coach to walk alongside you.
I get it--changes are hard--but remember the jar of pickles. Who wants to be splattered by pungent negativity every time you lose control of your emotions? Sure, it's tough to adjust how we respond to the stresses of life, but well worth the effort to learn to open that lid slowly and carefully so can enjoy its contents.
“You must learn to let go. Release the stress. You were never in control anyway.” --Steve Maraboli
Written by Amy Sargent.
http://the-iseiblog.com/contributing-authors/amy-sargent/
AFFIRMING THOUGHTS
What do you spend your time thinking about? Does your mind wander and fall into self-defeating thought patterns or do you choose liberating and empowering thoughts? Emotions are as transient as the weather, but we have the ability to choose our thoughts. We do this by paying attention to our thoughts and replacing those that don’t serve us well with affirmations.
Affirmations are clear, short statements of who we are and who we want to be. Don’t waste any time or energy thinking about your shortcomings or what you need to do to change. Instead, accept yourself exactly as you are. Be kind to yourself. Use affirmations.
I first heard about affirmations 20 years ago through a friend who was suffering from severe depression. Her therapist suggested she try affirmations, but really didn’t explain to my friend how to write powerful affirmations or how to use them effectively. It wasn’t until I became a parent that I began to study how affirmations work and how to use them effectively.
I realized as a new parent that I would be no better at disciplining my child than I was at disciplining myself. That’s when I decided to develop my own parenting affirmations. I posted them on my bathroom wall and began saying them every morning and every night: I am a loving, nurturing parent. I practice proactive discipline. I respond calmly to all situations. I explore and discover the world with my child. I wrote ten parenting affirmations in all that are still posted by my bathroom mirror.
Whatever it is you need, whatever it is you want, put it in the form of an affirmation. Pay attention to your thoughts throughout the day. Whenever you find yourself feeling worried or afraid, repeat your affirmations. Whenever a negative thought comes to mind, acknowledge and release it. Then think instead of a positive affirmation: I am safe. I am healthy. I am prosperous. I am loved. By directing your thoughts to positive things, you will create positive experiences in your life.
The most effective affirmations are the ones that you choose and create for yourself. Whatever it is that you’d like to change or improve, put it into affirming words.Tape your affirmations to your bathroom mirror and repeat them frequently throughout the day.
Make sure your affirmations are completely positive. If you say, “I am debt-free,” you are continuing to affirm debt whether you mean to or not. Take out all negative words (no, not, stop, refrain) and negative ideas (debt, need, fear, want). Write your affirmations in the present tense: “I am strong.” If you write your affirmation in the future tense, “I will be strong,” that keeps the strength you want out in the future instead of accepting it into your present being.
I put my favorite affirmations into a short poem that I’ve used every day for years:
I am grateful. I am kind.
I create what’s on my mind.
Perfect health.... Prosperity....
My world reflects the change in me.
Written by Laurie A. Gray, JD
http://www.socraticparenting.com/
A PERMANENT CURE FOR POST TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER
If you are suffering from PTSD then the very first thing you are looking for is ‘safety’. One of the biggest problems about suffering from PTSD is that you feel as if people do not understand you, what you are going through, or what you have been through. Most often, they do not! How could they? What you have been through is something that most people in the world could not conceive of. People can debate it, study it, talk about it, but unless they have been through it, they have no idea what someone who suffers from PTSD is going through.
So the very first thing you need is to feel safe, understood, and appreciated for what you have been through. You need to know that there is reverence for you, appreciation for something that may not be understood, yet still appreciated (this is reverence). Most therapists are textbook-driven, which means that they do not have an integral understanding of what real trauma is or feels like. The problem is that they cannot understand you and do not have the tools to bridge the gap between where you are and where they are. In fact, it’s more like a chasm in that it is just too broad of a gap for them to span consciously.
A therapist, who has spent his or her life studying textbooks and accumulating credentials, working with average every-day people, is not a good match for you. If you are a war veteran, rape victim, or refugee from a third world atrocity then there are precious few people who are going to understand and have the necessary reverence for what you have been through. In fact, more likely than not, only around 7% of therapists will actually be able to relate to you in a way that makes you feel appreciated for the sheer gravity of what you’ve been through. This is due to the fact that most therapists have not been exposed to any sort of extreme adversity within their own lives. In other words, it’s virtually impossible for them to relate to what you have been through from within the confines of an ‘atypical lifestyle’.
So you need to know that you are appreciated and respected for your ability to simply survive what you’ve been through. Instead of feeling isolated due to the sheer gap between what you and the average person have experienced in life, you need a safe place to be able to open and up express yourself. Without that feeling of safety then you may never be able to fully open up. This would seem to be obvious, yet most therapists are not quite there yet.
Emotional Integration on PTSD
The essence of pain and suffering is due to the suppression of painful emotions by your psyche. The psyche, in its inability to deal with extremely emotionally painful situations that arise, will attempt to protect you from this massive amount of pain by suppressing the emotions created from the experience. When this happens you are temporarily protected from the emotion of the experience and thus able to maintain your societal functionality. However, due to the fact that these painful emotions are suppressed in your psyche, they are not gone, but still present. Now, instead of being at the surface of your awareness where you can access them and know where the pain is coming from, they are deeply buried within your own subconscious. Here they will start to manifest adversity for you in the form of unconscious reactivity (which means to begin to feel badly and not know why, but further, to physically act out on this in ways that are attempts for you to not feel pain; drinking alcohol, taking drugs, and/or depression/violence/suicidal tendencies).
One of the trickiest aspects of deeply suppressed emotional charges is that they are suppressed because your psyche is trying to protect itself.
In other words, there is a part of you that feels as if it needs to keep you from ‘re-experiencing’ this trauma from the past. Further, that if you do not keep it repressed within your subconscious, you will be doomed to relive this trauma over and over again. So, in essence, your psyche does not want to let these suppressed emotional charges come up to the surface for fear of having to relive the event/s.
Emotional Integration is one of the first forms of therapy to cut straight through to the source of the problem; which is your deeply suppressed emotional charges from the traumatic experiences. Additionally, Emotional Integration is one of the first forms of therapy to recognize how the psyche operates and use this operational foundation as a vehicle for permanent healing. In other words, Emotional Integration respects the psyche’s right to protect itself and through honoring it, allows the psyche to actually heal itself. The technique offers an unprecedented breakthrough in healing due to the fact that it addresses healing at the actual source. The source of all pain and suffering comes from your suppressed emotional charges. Once this has been healed you are free to live a normal, happy, and productive life again.
You need no longer remain imprisoned within your own mind.
Emotional Integration has one aim and one aim only: to access and release (integrate) your suppressed emotional charges. When you can access, in a safe place, your deeply suppressed emotional charges and allow them (in a safe place) to fully surface, magic can and will happen. This magic is the integration of one of your deeply suppressed emotional charges. The result is also an integration (bringing back into one) of the part of your psyche associated with this emotional aspect of yourself. When this occurs, you will not only feel more at peace within yourself and less emotionally reactive, but you will also experience a greater sense of ‘self’. This means that a part of your personality has been ‘freed up’ and can now bring additional intelligence back into your psyche.
Emotional Integration is powerful in that, quite often, you may experience complete healing in only one session. Often, total healing can be accomplished in as little as 6 sessions. This is because Emotional Integration bypasses the ‘why’ which would enable your ego to continue to create ‘phantom reasons’ for your pain and suffering. The ego loves statistics, reasons, logic, and rationale due to the fact that it can prolong its life and bolster its sense of ‘self importance’ in this way. Emotional Integration does not care ‘why’ you suffer, but focuses on the actual healing instead.
An important question to ask yourself is: ‘Do I want to know why or do I want to be healed?’
The ego wants to know why. The Soul wants to be healed.
Emotional Integration offers the fast track to reclaiming your emotional freedom and reclaiming your life. It is never too late to take your life back and to feel fully alive again.
To learn more you can join us on facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EmotionalIntegration
Written by Christopher Pinckley
I WANT MY BODY BACK
Humans have their own uniqueness and genetic makeup so to lose weight isn’t one size fit all. Explore the inner workings of your mind to find your true authentic self in order to lose the weight you want.
It takes a certain amount of focus and determination to lose weight, so your mental attitude and self-confidence is imperative in finding your unique style of fitness.
Fasting and Spirituality will provide you with the consistency, determination, and the foundation you need to lose weight
· We need to feel that we were born for a reason.
· We want to feel value, a sense of importance.
· We want to live a life full of meaning and fulfillment with a sense of personal power.
· We have a need for success.
· And, we need to love.
Therapy of Thought helps one lose weight because the man or woman who is successful is thinking creatively, intuitively and above all optimistically.
In order to think creatively, intuitively, and optimistically, we need passion, energy, emotion, and focus.
Affirmations are a powerful way to establish a new guided attention for your life. Positive words and phrases will be absorbed in your subconscious mind when you read them daily. Your thoughts will become your reality.
I AM – I Love and Accept my body the way it is and work to make it better
I AM – Wonderful. I AM Brilliant. I have the Power to realize my goal
I AM – Strong! I Create My Reality. Power is in my Thoughts
I AM – The Master of My Life
I AM – Excited about the person I am about to become
I AM – Getting healthier and healthier
I AM – Pain free and my body is full of energy. I Love Myself
I AM – A unique person. I approve of myself
I AM – I Love Myself the way I AM
I AM – My Unique Style of Fit because I am Healthy and Happy
I AM – Free to Create my own Style of Fitness
I AM – Successful in All Areas of my life
I AM – Creative with Self- Empowerment because I radiate good health
By Dr. Audrey Pullman
www.audreygriefexpressionist.com
Please call (703-400-7321) or email (audreypullman@gmail.com) for individual, couple, or group workshop sessions.
CAN REAL LOVE IMPROVE YOUR HEALTH AND MORE?
What “if” one simple concept might help improve your health and other areas of your life too? What if … life could be easier if we learned to change our perspective and see things in a new way?
Real love, unconditional love, is an energy, some say, is the foundation from which everything emerges into our world. It is the energy which grows us from microscopic cells into full grown adults without a manual! It is the energy which breathes us, pumps our heart, allows us to walk, talk, taste, see, touch, eat, digest food, eliminate waste without having to micro manage our bodies!! It grows everything in nature, including animals, insects and microscopic creatures we never even know exist! It never stops giving no matter how much we take.
Many of us love to hold a new born baby or puppy or kitten, fresh and still connected to their Divine Nature. Watch very young children and they rarely judge anyone by their color, deformity, wealth, race, age, poverty or gender. They just love everyone! They must be taught who to trust, who to fear, who to judge, who to love. None of these things come naturally. Soldiers must be trained and brainwashed into “hating the enemy” in order to be good, strong soldiers. It is not in their nature to just easily kill other people.
Loving without conditions means there is no judgement, revenge, punishment, inspiring feelings of guilt and shame. You can… not like or approve of what someone does, however, you still love them. You love for the joy love gives you, because it is your natural nature to do so. It’s like breathing. No one must act or behave in a certain way to earn your love. Love given without conditions is what heals, transforms, opens hearts, soothes the pain, turns someone around. While hate and revenge only continue to inspire more of the same!
When you judge, hate, feel wounded or enraged, your entire body suffers! Your breathing is more shallow. It’s more difficult for your heart to pump and your muscles all tense up greatly constricting many other functions in your body. You get fatigued very easily. Sometimes just for a few minutes, and other times for hours or you are angry for days on end! Stress is not beneficial for our bodies and can create illnesses and dis-ease..
No one forces you to judge, hate, and become enraged. These are habits often taught, or acquired and developed over years and years, often evolving from many sources. They can be changed. You are always “free to choose” how you respond to every single situation in your life.
When you learn to make “loving without conditions” a new habit, less and less things bother you anymore. As you learn to love yourself and others without conditions, you learn we are all doing the best we can every day, even though that might not be very good some days and better on others. When you choose to love, you think and respond with more compassion, understanding and clarity. You make better decisions. You feel better and are healthier because of this.
You cannot change the entire world, stop the wars, end hunger, prevent hurricanes and tornadoes, end mass shootings. You can, however, send all those situations, and all those people “Unconditional Love for their highest and best good.” Your unconditional loving energy can help transform the world, and in doing so, you also help yourself to live a happier, healthier, more joy filled life in many new ways!
This article was written by Morgine Jurdan
Click HERE to Learn more about Morgine’s work.
WEBSITE: https://morginejurdan.com/
I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR MY BEAUTIFUL OASIS OF FLESH
I praise my own geography at last …
I am so grateful for my beautiful oasis of flesh which carries me about in this garden of life.
Each little dimple and wrinkle, each crevice and valley all my own.
There is no where else on earth I could find a place such as this, so alive, so divine and uniquely me.
I rub my hands gently absorbing the stories it tells me of holding life and birthing babies, slicing and taking away my gallbladder, walking up mountains, climbing tall trees and jumping off.
— True self-care is about holistic health. Jill Kay recently introduced me to Arbonne, the #1 global brand for healthy living inside and out. I tried the products and loved them! Check out their certified vegan, cruelty-free, gluten-free, nontoxic products by clicking HERE. You will be very surprised! —
I remember walking across coals and never being burnt. My spirit telling me to go ahead, because it was all an illusion anyway.
My beloved body carries me to and through every moment there is and beyond, allowing me to respond to life and its glorious magnificence. Feeling the wet grass beneath my feet, snowflakes coating my hair.
I inhale the fragrance of Freesias, appreciate their vibrant colors and taste chocolate upon my lips, all with this sacred vessel in which I can experience the Divine and the all which I am! I praise my own geography at last!
This article was written by Morgine Jurdan
Click HERE to Learn more about Morgine’s work.
WEBSITE: https://morginejurdan.com/
I LOVE ME…
For everything I am
for everything i am not
I love me
at my best
and
at my worst
I love me
smiling frowning laughing
playing screaming crying pounding
I am always Grace
no matter what face I wear
you are my reflection
and I am yours
I love me
for the Sake of Loving
for the Honor and Appreciation
I feel and experience
fully embracing
all of me
for in Receiving
All I am
in
Every Precious Moment
nothing gets wasted
all of me remains
Whole and Perfect
held in the universal heart
where the Love
which is always embracing me
the Love
which is everywhere and endless
allows space for
my Grace to grow
and know itself fully
once again.
I am so Grateful
I am extended the gift
of my friendship
so i can dance into the beauty
I truly am
This article was written by Morgine Jurdan
Click HERE to Learn more about Morgine’s work.
WEBSITE: https://morginejurdan.com/
TRIAL AND ERROR: BROKEN METABOLISM AND HEALING
I remember going through different websites, looking for a trainer that would offer a workout and a meal program. Someone I trusted or had seen before. So, there was my solution: Jillian Michaels! I had heard about her from the show The Biggest Loser and had started seeing her supplements and other products at the store. So, I thought I'd give her a shot.
She had everything I needed on her website. An app that would help me download the workout schedule and programs, as well as the recipes to eat healthy and be in the best shape of my life. I have to admit, at the beginning it was daunting! I started off by throwing away all the junk food I had in my kitchen cabinets and fridge. Then, I restocked on the ingredients I would need for my healthy meals.
I was pretty consistent and disciplined with the meal plan and workout program Jillian had chosen for me and had started to notice positive changes. I also incorporated yoga and running into my workout program.
The last thing I added to my already-dialed-in-new-lifestyle was supplements such as multi-vitamins made from foods and not synthetics, organic protein powders and fat burners. It was these last ones that took my metabolism out of whack. The results were ugly: Insomnia and Amenorrhea. I was not dying, but I was sending my body the signal that I was. So, what did I do? I looked for help. I wanted to treat my insomnia first, so, I went to different doctors and they all told me to take melatonin and relax. They did some thyroid testing on me and it all came back fine. So, they assumed it was all in my head. I tried getting a different opinion from another doctor, but I was told the same thing. This time, though, I was sent back home with a benzodiazepine. Pretty much, a drug that would make me unconscious so I could "sleep". I had to taper to get off this medication once I was able to "sleep" again. My insomnia got "fixed" after a month of sleeping only 2-5 hours per night. The only thing that didn't get fixed was my amenorrhea. It took me 5 years to get that fixed. And, along those 5 years, I experienced some more insomnia.
It was then that I started looking for more experts in the Eastern/Functional medicine atmosphere and, only then, was I able to understand what was going on with me and how I could fix myself. I learned that what I ate would impact my sleep cycle and overall metabolism. And, I learned that carbs were not the enemy, that the good kind were actually needed by our bodies to create some hormones as well as the oh-so-feared-and-hated fat!
My fat journey started with Dave Asprey, then continued not only with him but with Dr. Joseph Mercola, Robb Wolf, Dr. Sarah Ballentyne and Dr. David Perlmutter. Most of these experts always followed a principle: Eat whole, gluten-free foods and listen to your body. That's what I had been missing for years: Listening to my body! We lack that mind-body connection that is so needed in order to be in harmony with our bodies, relationships and overall life. After cracking the code for what works for my body and what makes my metabolism happy, I knew I had to visit my demons and start working on my psychology and spirituality... And so, I started my meditation journey, which took me to places I never thought it would....
This article was written by Michelle Schacherer
Click HERE to Learn more about Michelle’s work.
WEBSITE: http://mschacherercrossfitter.blogspot.com
HEALING STARTS FROM THE INSIDE: MY SPIRITUAL JOURNEY
Sometimes in order to fix a bigger problem, we need to start by fixing ourselves. And that's where I had to start to release all the mental chains I had that prevented me from being myself. These included persons and ideas that kept me from reaching my highest potential.
The first thing I had to do was love myself. I know, you can ask anyone if they love themselves and they will say "yes", but, once they start digging deeper, they realize that they haven't really been loving themselves. In the same way that healing and personal growth require introspection and care, building a business aligned with your spiritual journey calls for choosing partners that resonate with your values. Looking into Zenbusiness reviews can offer insights into a supportive, efficient service to help manifest your vision into reality.
Someone who loves themselves would never allow anyone else to do something harmful to them. One important thing that helped me prevent this was when I started saying "no". It was not easy, but it has been one of the best things I have ever done for myself. What I realized after I started saying "no", was that I was saying "yes" to something I liked and that made me feel fine.
Another thing I did was start a meditation practice that I religiously continue to this day. Every morning, you'll find me taking at least 5 minutes to do conscious breathing, to be grateful, or to forgive. The 2 things that have benefitted me the most have been gratitude and forgiveness. Through gratitude, I have been able to really appreciate the small things in life: a warm cup of coffee, a goat milk yogurt (I mean, how often do you find that while traveling?!), people who love and support me for who I am, the food on my table, having a roof over my head, my health... Ultimately, being thankful for the magic and perfection of life on earth as a whole. Through forgiveness, instead, I learned to forgive myself and everything I've done wrongly. To forgive my mind always judging me and always criticizing every move I make or the body I have. I learned to forgive my parents for the way they reacted to my weight issues while I was a kid since their frustration didn't allow them to see the damage they were doing to me; I forgave anyone who had hurt me out of their own pain, because it was not them doing something bad to me on purpose, it was their own ignorance and suffering that made them act like that. Forgiveness is a selfish act. We forgive to free ourselves from the emotional burden, not to make someone else happy. So, if you haven't tried it out yet, now's the time to start!
Meditation and spiritualism, besides reinforcing the body-mind connection, helped me connect better to the world. Thanks to that, I no longer see things as independent, I see them as part of an interdependent system. This just became more evident after my mom passed away. An event like this transforms you either for your best or worse. But, in my case, it helped me learn that everything in life is energy: yourself, what you see, what you can't see, and your thoughts. Matter doesn't disappear, it just transforms. And, that's why, even if I miss my mom every day, I know that she's everywhere: In the air I breathe, the smiling child running in the garden, the tree I touch, etc.
Knowing how the type of energy I surround myself with and the one I vibrate on are important for my overall life, I decided to change my environment, and this included my relationships. It was not easy since I had to cut ties with many people and make drastic changes, but the results were astonishing...
This article was written by Michelle Schacherer
Click HERE to Learn more about Michelle’s work.
WEBSITE: http://mschacherercrossfitter.blogspot.com
LOOK OUT YOUR WINDOW
When its early or late, I can’t see outside.
It’s dark and that means the outside just hides.
But the moment it’s light, great things come in view
My window shows me the things that are new.
When I look out my window I see cars drive by.
And with eyes looking up I see airplanes on high.
When I look out of my window I see wind in the trees.
The branches all dance as it moves through the leaves.
When I look out of my window, I see rain and some snow.
The cars and the trucks have to go really slow.
When I look out my window, I see people walking.
With arms always moving – they never stop talking.
When I look out my window, it’s my neighbors I see
And they always do smile and wave right back at me.
When I look out my window, I see kids on the bus.
Laughing and talking with so much to discuss.
When I look out my window I see men who are mowing
the yards and the grass that never stops growing.
When I look out of my window, I see squirrels and some birds
They get a lot done without using our words.
When I look out my window I see big and small dogs
I see all sorts of birds and some snakes and some frogs.
When I look out my window, I see flowers so bright.
Red and dark blue, yellow, orange and some white.
When I look out my window, thick clouds and some thinner,
Go racing by, now who is the winner?
When I look out my window, I see runners jog
They run in the rain, in the wind and the fog.
When I stand at my window, something important I see,
Dad’s car comes in view, coming home to see me.
I spend time at my window, stand still and don’t race.
This is my special and very remarkable place.
To watch all that happens and to learn about me.
There is so much to watch, to notice and see.
So I stand at my window and take it all in.
I watch, look and listen, and take life for a spin.
This article was written by Jay Forte
Click HERE to Learn more about Jay’s work
WEBSITE: https://thefortefactor.com/
REDUCING EMOTIONAL EATING
Having high emotional granularity is a vital tool for reducing emotional eating. The term was coined by Northeastern University Psychology Professor Lisa Feldman Barrett shortly after the turn of the century and refers to the ability to recognize, identify and express a full range of emotions. People with high emotional granularity have “finely tuned feelings.” They value emotions and are in touch with them most of the time. Moreover, they don’t lump all emotions together, but feel and can describe their nuances. Upset might be parsed as frightened, dismayed or exasperated. Angry might be viewed as frustrated, helpless or fearful.
Says Barrett, “Emotional granularity isn’t just about having a rich vocabulary; it’s about experiencing the world, and yourself, more precisely. This can make a difference in your life. In fact, there is growing scientific evidence that precisely tailored emotional experiences are good for you, even if those experiences are negative.” (“Are You in Despair? That’s Good,” The NY Times, 6/3/16, http://clbb.mgh.harvard.edu/are-you-in-despair-thats-good/#more-7340, accessed 1/29/19).
“According to a collection of studies, finely grained, unpleasant feelings allow people to be more agile at regulating their emotions, less likely to drink excessively when stressed and less likely to retaliate aggressively against someone who has hurt them…Perhaps surprisingly, the benefits of high emotional granularity are not only psychological. People who achieve it are also likely to have longer, healthier lives. They go to the doctor and use medication less frequently, and spend fewer days hospitalized for illness. Cancer patients, for example, have lower levels of harmful inflammation when they more frequently categorize, label and understand their emotions.”
There’s evidence that emotional granularity improves mental health. Higher emotional granularity translates to better coping skills and, therefore, fewer maladaptive behaviors such as addictions. Relationships also improve when people are attuned to emotions.
How emotionally granular are you? Do you have difficulty identifying your feelings? Do you ignore them? Lump them together? Therapy can help because it provides a safe place to learn about and discuss emotions. By becoming more tuned in to them, you’ll up your emotional intelligence and do less mindless or binge eating.
This article was written by Karen R. Koenig
Click HERE to Learn more about Karen’s work.
WEBSITES: http://www.karenrkoenig.com/
http://www.nicegirlsfinishfat.com/
WHEN IT’S JUST NOT YOUR DAY
I knew it first thing, when I started the day
That things were not going to go in my way.
I tried to be happy and grateful, I say.
But I really knew, it was just not my day.
I tripped on the stairs and came down with a crash.
Into the sink went my phone, with a great splash.
The note for my teacher got thrown in the trash.
This day, I just knew, would not go by in a flash.
At school I forgot that my project was due.
At lunch they were serving a yucky beef stew.
In art class I spilled a container of glue.
Not a good day, this is something I knew.
My teacher seemed to just focus on me.
Telling and scolding is all I did see.
“Start over! Be quiet! Stand in line!” said she.
Today is not great, I bet you agree.
I missed the bus and walked home in the rain.
I stepped off the curb and gave my ankle a sprain.
I got soaked with the spray from a very fast train.
Today, you can see, is a very big pain.
Home and all wet, off to my room with a huff.
I needed a moment when feeling this gruff.
Things that had happened were so truly tough.
Today, on this day, I had just had enough.
Off to the kitchen with my head in my hands
Upset at a day that I did not understand.
How things can go so against all my plans.
Today, was the worst day in all of the land.
Mom asked, “What’s up, what’s making you sad?”
“Nothing,” I said, trying not to get mad.
“Tell me,” she said, “About the day that you had.”
Can we make it much better, or a little less bad?”
I shrugged then recounted without a delay
How everything seemed to just not go my way.
Not sure what could help or what thing she could say
That would improve this most terrible and horrible day.
She smiled and said, “Some days make you scream
They feel like an awful and really bad dream.
There one thing that makes it a bit less extreme
A bowl, no, a big bowl of your favorite ice cream.”
Two scoops and my mood changed, right on the spot.
We talked about things and what the day brought.
Some things just work out and some things just do not.
Life send what it sends, you get what you got.
Don’t argue and stress and get all distraught.
Be patient and learn from all you’ve been taught.
This article was written by Jay Forte
Click HERE to Learn more about Jay’s work.
WEBSITE: https://thefortefactor.com/
RECOVERING FROM EATING DISORDER
Putting Emotions To Work To Overcome Your Eating Disorder
Whether you’re just beginning to address your under- or overeating problems or have been making steady progress over years or decades, there’s one area that you will have to come to terms with sooner or later to achieve full recovery. To achieve a satisfying, nourishing, happy, and successful life without food problems, you will have to learn how put your emotions to work for you. This means not dancing around them by eating or calorie counting, obsessing about what you can/can’t/should/shouldn’t eat, or focusing on whether the numbers on the scale are moving up or down.
For many disordered eaters, identifying and sitting with feelings is the last hurdle to becoming a “normal” eater. Most are willing and often eager to practice new food- and weight-related behaviors, such as making satisfying food choices, eating mindfully, taking larger or smaller bites, throwing out the scale, eating without distractions, taking deep breaths after each mouthful, and staying connected to the body’s pleasure center during the eating process. But most people with eating problems—actually, most people, period—have difficulty getting comfortable with feelings. It’s important for you to recognize that disordered eaters are far from the only ones who have difficulty handling emotions. To greater or lesser extent, everyone does.
Unfortunately, every time you use food (move toward or away from it) instead of feeling an authentic emotion, you miss an opportunity to discover something about what’s happening in your internal world. Think of your emotions as equivalent to your senses. The latter alert us to our reaction to our environment—thumbs up or thumbs down—through touch, smell, sight, hearing, and taste. Our feelings have a similar function as they provide us with information about our reaction to people and situations. The function of both our senses and our emotions is to move us toward pleasure and away from pain. Emotions help us decide what is self-threatening—smelling smoke and seeing flames across the room—and what is self-enhancing—sensory delight derived from gazing out over the ocean as gulls soar overhead and the sun dips into the sea.
— True self-care is about holistic health. Jill Kay recently introduced me to Arbonne, the #1 global brand for healthy living inside and out. I tried the products and loved them! Check out their certified vegan, cruelty-free, gluten-free, nontoxic products by clicking HERE. You will be very surprised! —
If you’re like most people, you don’t realize the value and purpose of emotions and assume they’re not important, or worse, that uncomfortable feelings should be avoided at all cost. But, I bet you’d never think of shutting off your senses and wandering through the world without them. Well, that’s exactly what you do every time you ignore or minimize a feeling.
What if emotions aren’t the demons you’ve made them out to be? What if emotions are your teachers and your care-takers? What if they’re not trash but treasures?
One of the reasons that emotions get a bad rap is that they can feel truly awful. We may believe that if something doesn’t feel good, it can’t be good, but this is far from the truth. There are lots of painful cures to what ails us that we tolerate because we know they are necessary and promote ultimate health and well-being—injections, dental fillings and implants, physical therapy, and surgery, to name a few. No one says, gee, terrific, I’m going to have my body sliced open today and then I’ll be in pain for weeks on end recovering. However, inspite of the fact that it’s often a nasty business, people schedule surgery because they know they’ll feel better in the long run.
The same is true of emotions. Just because they hurt or make you feel badly does not mean they are bad. Like musical notes and colors (and foods too!), there are no good or bad emotions. They’re what’s called value neutral. Think of them as messengers, giving you vital information about what’s happening within your internal landscape—you’re disappointed, ashamed, overwhelmed, overjoyed, furious, grief-stricken, content, shocked, revolted, elated, confused, lonely, excited, helpless. True, some of these feelings are excruciating and hard to bear, but they do pass and people survive them every day and have since the beginning of human existence. Half the battle is allowing yourself to be with your feelings without making judgments about them or the kind of person you are for having them. It’s a great deal easier to acknowledge, identify, experience, explore, and deal with feelings without all the associated criticisms you have of them or of yourself.
Recovering from an eating disorder means blossoming into a full, emotionally mature person. For that to happen, you must (yes, must) learn to experience all of your feelings; you can’t pick and choose. Becoming emotionally healthy is an all or nothing proposition, but one you can learn over time. If you believe you can’t bear your feelings alone, find a therapist who can guide you through them. Share your feelings with friends, start a journal, hug yourself, cry, holler til you’re hoarse, beat your pillow, sob til you’re exhausted.
At some point in recovery, you have to choose between food and feeling. You already know where your food obsession will lead you, so why not give feelings a try?
This article was written by Karen R. Koenig
Click HERE to Learn more about Karen’s work.
WEBSITES: http://www.karenrkoenig.com/
http://www.nicegirlsfinishfat.com/
UNDER ONE GREAT BIG SKY
No matter your work – if you build, write or fly.
No matter your race – if you’re a girl or a guy.
No matter if you’re bold, or tall or just shy
We show up each day, under the same great big sky.
Some try to say, that they know what’s right.
They push and control – they do things with might.
Some say, “Be like us or we can’t let you in.”
“And we don’t really like the the color of your skin.”
Some feel they were born better, more important or greater.
Some think it’s okay to be a big hater
Of people who are different, and those not so spry,
But we all live right here, under the same great big sky.
Some think they are better by the things that they own
Where they shop, what they buy, or how well they are known.
They compare and complain about all of the others.
They forget that down deep we are all truly brothers.
Not one of us is more special, not one wins the prize.
Not one has more value, or a right to despise.
Not one has more worth – let me just simplify,
We each show up now, under the same great big sky.
We are all different – the face, skin and the nose;
The successes and failures, the highs and the lows.
Down deep is your spark, a gift so divine.
Know it and live it; it’s yours and its mine.
You are amazing, great, awesome and blest.
You have strengths and big gifts, just like all of the rest.
If we’re all so amazing, I have to ask why
We can’t get along, under this one great big sky?
Right here and right now, we’re all sharing space.
No matter the skills, or gender or race.
It belongs to us all, not some, not a few.
We all really matter. Me, him, her and you.
When you look at another don’t find fault and take part
In judging, critiquing. Focus more on their heart.
See they are trying to live and get by
Hoping and dreaming, under our one great big sky.
Make room in your space for those who don’t share
Your approach to this life and about what you care.
Imagine if you will – you can if you choose –
A world where all matter, not one where some lose.
What has to change in you and in me
To live in a world where we all get to be
Just who we are, with no need to be shy
Living together, under our one great big sky?
If you see someone living with treatment unjust,
One who is struggling – pay attention – we must.
Tune in to notice what’s really there.
Reach out, go help, and be ready to care.
We each get to be here, to work hard and try
No matter our race, whether a girl or a guy.
No matter our work, if we build, write or fly;
To be our best selves, under our one great big sky.
So, look just above at this space big and wide.
It’s there for us ALL; it’s there to provide.
We each get this space, this time and this life.
Respect it and share it, don’t bring on the strife.
Show up on purpose! Be here! Don’t be shy!
Let’s all make some room, under our one great big sky.
This article was written by Jay Forte
Click HERE to Learn more about Jay’s work.
WEBSITE: https://thefortefactor.com/
